Dane Cook Funny MO FO!

[ViciouS]

My buddy just brought over his CD, and i laughed so hard my stomach hurts and i have a headache.

Do not click if you have a heart condition, or have to be really quite.

 

[slick230]

LOL, i have the CD/DVD too, and I think he's hilarious.

 

[anxi80]

"someone sh*t on the coats! some one... has.. sh*t on the coats!"

 

[slick230]

Originally posted by: anxi80
"someone sh*t on the coats! some one... has.. sh*t on the coats!"

"there is a smell of sh!t in the vicinity of the coats!"

 

[FrustratedUser]

 

[anxi80]

Originally posted by: slick230
"there is a smell of sh!t in the vicinity of the coats!"

:laugh:

"oh my gawd dane, there was a fire down the street from my house. there was like a thousand firefighters out there!"
"no there was not! thats way too many firefighters. they'd all be out there bumping into each other 'what the f*ck are we doing out here guys?!'. there's like a thousand of us, who called a thousand of us?!"

 

[wasserkool]

GOOD POST OP!!!

this video is excellent for the first joke he says:
HIT BY CARD
(NO GORE OR VIOLENCE)

 

[rocadelpunk]

it's a treat to see him live.

guys/gals should really download his live stuff as his facial expression/hand movements/various manurisms (sp) really take his comedy to another level.

He is one of my favorite comics, it not the favorite.

 

[slick230]

Originally posted by: anxi80

Originally posted by: slick230
"there is a smell of sh!t in the vicinity of the coats!"

:laugh:

"oh my gawd dane, there was a fire down the street from my house. there was like a thousand firefighters out there!"
"no there was not! thats way too many firefighters. they'd all be out there bumping into each other 'what the f*ck are we doing out here guys?!'. there's like a thousand of us, who called a thousand of us?!"

LOL.

"I just woke up. I took like a 100 hour nap"
"Bullsh!t. A 100 hour nap is like a coma. If you would have said "I just woke up from a coma" I could follow this conversation better"

 

[ViciouS]

"Bee's..Fvck Bee's" "Not without Coops" "This tire hit hunted Mary down, this tire MURDERED Mary" "I was in my Kitchen washing a Dish"

My friends and I are always quoting this guy.

 

[anxi80]

Originally posted by: slick230
"I just woke up. I took like a 100 hour nap"
"Bullsh!t. A 100 hour nap is like a coma. If you would have said "I just woke up from a coma" I could follow this conversation better"

hahaha. i was dying at this part:

"when you are going to see another person's cash and prizes for the first time... the first time you're going to see the other person's downtown bonaza. so you check it out and hope that its nice, and she pulled down her underwear and im happy to say she had a nice situation, thats what i call it.

ok, lets be honest, because some girls... bad situation! horrible situation to be in. i dont like if a girl has a lot of lips, it looks like a box of cow tongues all jammed up. looks like a high school play curtain that you cant get out of. but she had a nice *fa-shwing*, excellent situation. if it was a cottage, id rent it for the summer."

 

[slick230]

Originally posted by: anxi80

Originally posted by: slick230
"I just woke up. I took like a 100 hour nap"
"Bullsh!t. A 100 hour nap is like a coma. If you would have said "I just woke up from a coma" I could follow this conversation better"

hahaha. i was dying at this part:

"when you are going to see another person's cash and prizes for the first time... the first time you're going to see the other person's downtown bonaza. so you check it out and hope that its nice, and she pulled down her underwear and im happy to say she had a nice situation, thats what i call it.

ok, lets be honest, because some girls... bad situation! horrible situation to be in. i dont like if a girl has a lot of lips, it looks like a box of cow tongues all jammed up. looks like a high school play curtain that you cant get out of. but she had a nice *fa-shwing*, excellent situation. if it was a cottage, id rent it for the summer."

HAHA!

"You have a stinky pvssy."
"You have a smelly sack."

LOLOLOL

 

[BigJ]

"May 14th, 1985: I had a very itchy as$hole. This one ousted it. GET OUTTA HERE, old itchy as$hole."

 

[NatePo717]

I saw him live at RIT (cost me $10). So Fvkn funny!

 

[Furyline]

He is excellent, and even better live. He has a ton of energy; the show I went to was incredibly fun.

 

[MisfitsFiend]

bookmarked for home

 

[sygyzy]

Definitely one of my favorite comedians. I have listened to his new CD 3 times now!

 

[Acanthus]

He is one of the best comedians around. My personal favorite.

 

[ViciouS]

I've listend to his first cd like 10 times, and the new one like 2 already got it 4 days ago.

 

[cjgallen]

HAHAHA, I love Dane Cook!!!

 

[ViciouS]

Anyone see him on Jimmy Kimmel? LOL

 

[ViciouS]

That yoga guy is freakin nuts!