Critique my letter to the editor.

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
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Am I too much of a tool?

Link to the article

My reply:

To the Editorial Staff of the Daily,

In response to the editorial from Monday, October 6, entitled ?Dorms Like Dungeons?:

HFS has, in the last four years, renovated Haggett, McCarty, Terry and Lander Halls. They also renovated McMahon Hall?s dining and plaza levels and Ian?s Domain. This, in itself, is testament to HFS?s commitment to improving the aging residence halls. Nordheim Court also opened this last July, providing an additional 460 beds for upperclassmen (this number agrees with the projected capacity shortfall from the data available when the project was begun in 1999).

In response to the suggestion of building an entirely new dorm, there are two considerations of which to be mindful. First, the UW student population has gone through a period of unusual growth in the last four years, from 36,861 in Autumn 1998 to 39,828 in Autumn 2002, whereas the population had remained between 36,000 and 37,000 for the six years prior. Second, there have also been greater variations in population size each Autumn for the past four years than have occurred historically.

HFS should not commit to another new building until the student population growth is stable year to year, as it has been historically. Other projects have already been undertaken and their effects have yet to be fully realized. Such a huge additional capital investment without certainty as to its need would be foolish and a waste of taxpayers?, and residents?, money.

Me
Junior, Economics
 

ProviaFan

Lifer
Mar 17, 2001
14,993
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I'm in Indiana, so I can't comment much, but your grammar and spelling seems to be great (and even more so when compared to typical ATOT eloquence) from a quick scan of your composition. :)
 

Ness

Diamond Member
Jul 10, 2002
5,407
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You may want to state your experience in the matter. Are you a resident?

"as a resident, I can say from experience that the dorm rooms have greatly improved since the renovations and that is clearly a more cost-efficient way to go."

Something like that, maybe.
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: ness1469
You may want to state your experience in the matter. Are you a resident?

"as a resident, I can say from experience that the dorm rooms have greatly improved since the renovations and that is clearly a more cost-efficient way to go."

Something like that, maybe.

Considering I'm in my second year of working for the dept., I'm trying to be as ambiguous as possible. :p
 

Entity

Lifer
Oct 11, 1999
10,090
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Meh. You're writing a letter to the editor; too much eloquence, too little vitriol. :D

Rob
 

Willoughbyva

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2001
3,267
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What happened to "If you build it they will come."? :)

Where I am college enrollment is projected to sharply increase for the next decade or more. Not only are colleges feeling a pinch but also K-12 schools in my area. What is enrollment expected to do for the next decade or so in your area?

 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: Willoughbyva
What happened to "If you build it they will come."? :)

Where I am college enrollment is projected to sharply increase for the next decade or more. Not only are colleges feeling a pinch but also K-12 schools in my area. What is enrollment expected to do for the next decade or so in your area?

As far as I understand it, we are at our enrollment limit and attempting to hold it there until we can get more funding from the state legislature. This is projected to be like this for quite a while.

For the last decade or so the dorms have been either at half capacity, or, for the last four years, at full capacity.
 

Willoughbyva

Diamond Member
Sep 26, 2001
3,267
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The school I go to is going to try 3 full semesters a year now (so I hear). Spring, summer, and fall. The addition of a full time summer session will allow either more students to attend or students will be able to get their their degree earlier and get out of the system.
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: Willoughbyva
The school I go to is going to try 3 full semesters a year now (so I hear). Spring, summer, and fall. The addition of a full time summer session will allow either more students to attend or students will be able to get their their degree earlier and get out of the system.

We have four quarters a year, summer qtr is a great time to take classes (in my opinion), I've done it my first two quarters and will probably do it my third. (even if I graduate this year) I will probably take at least one summer class throughout grad/law school as well.
 

Tinkerhell

Golden Member
Jul 12, 2003
1,225
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HFS has, in the last four years, renovated Haggett, McCarty, Terry and Lander Halls, and completely renovated McMahon Hall?s dining and plaza levels and Ian?s Domain.


I think you should change this to:

In the last four years, HFS has renovated the Hagget, McCarty, Terry, and Landeer Halls. They renovated, in entirety, Machahon Hall's dining and plaza levels and Ian's Domain.

Now it doesn't sound as awkward. just my 2 cents :)
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: Tinkerhell
HFS has, in the last four years, renovated Haggett, McCarty, Terry and Lander Halls, and completely renovated McMahon Hall?s dining and plaza levels and Ian?s Domain.


I think you should change this to:

In the last four years, HFS has renovated the Hagget, McCarty, Terry, and Landeer Halls. They renovated, in entirety, Machahon Hall's dining and plaza levels and Ian's Domain.

Now it doesn't sound as awkward. just my 2 cents :)

Very good point. Thank you!