Crazy childhood memories?

[dannybek]

I remember when I was younger when passing by a street I saw the word "detour" on the middle of it. Well I thought detour meant Detroit saw I was like "oooh so that's the direction to Detroit."

I use to thing razor blades were mini-vaccums until the blood on my face told me it wasn't.

I wasn't afraid of ghost, wild animals or the boogeyman. But I was afraid of aliens. No so much the abductions or experiments but the spooky music that I thought they would play.

I remember when I was younger I was minding my own business, riding my bicycle when this old black man wanted to fight me for apparently no reason. Well someone saw the whole thing and came to my aid. I didn't understand. That is until when looking back at old photos of myself I noticed I was wearing a t-shirt with the confederate flag on it! What the... I guess my parents didn't know.

I remember my brother and I use to throw hot water out of our third floor window and aim for people. What can I say? We were boys. Stupid boys.

 

[HamburgerBoy]

When I was younger I used to think my nose was a bug on my face and would smack it a lot.

 

[AreaCode707]

I must have been four when I heard my dad say he was going to stop drinking. Even at that age, I remember wondering how he was going to give up water and juice and all the soda he drank.

 

[Farang]

I remember my oldest brother getting us to build a climbing wall in our backyard for him. He would have us compete for "points," which we would earn by doing more work, and with these points we would earn time using the climbing wall. After, we realized that we were the ones who built the damn thing and he could go to hell. But he still had us for a good few weeks. In my defense I was like 4 at the time and the youngest, my older two brother's should have know better.

The oldest brother went on to get his MBA no doubt.. tricky bastard.

 

[WildHorse]

Poking a stick at the giant spider suspended in the huge web.

Spider disappeared.

Later while still holding stick, turned it over, monster spider had crawled up the stick & was about 1/8" from my hand, stalking me for its revenge.

I freaked & ran, nay, flew away. I was maybe 4 yrs old.

 

[bdude]

Watching blue angels fly above my pre-school for july 4th from the nearby air base.

 

[Jeff7]

I always thought "round of applause" was "round of a pause." It made very little sense to me. Clap your hands in a circle and then freeze in place?

And when going up and down stairs, I always liked starting and ending on my left foot. I don't remember why.

Originally posted by: bdude
Watching blue angels fly above my pre-school for july 4th from the nearby air base.

Ah, that reminds me of my fear of ultra-lights (1-person aircraft) and helicopters. I think I called helicopters "hopoppas" for awhile, before I learned the correct pronunciation. I guess pimpin's in my blood. Werd.
But anyway, those things scared me. They were noisy, and they weren't normal airplanes. I'd run inside screaming if one flew over.

My mom also told me that I remembered my own birth. When I was young, before I knew anything about the birthing process, I talked about something a long time ago, a bright room with a lot of commotion, and I was upset because suddenly it was really really cold.


Maybe I'll remember other things, I'm sure I had some weird or entertaining ideas when I was younger.

 

[thetxstang]

I distinctly remember being four years old and watching our mutt dog, Tito, carrying her puppies from one location in our backyard to another. Of course, as mother dogs do (as well as most animals), she used her mouth to transport the puppies.

I was absolutely mesmerized, for some reason. I just thought it was the coolest thing, and watched every minute it took for her to carefully move each of her six puppies.

It finally occurred to me that what I really wanted do was carry one of the puppies in my mouth, just like Tito did. Long story made short, I did...but not without repercussions. The unfortunate pup I selected began yelping in pain. My mother came dashing out of the house and gave me a good ol' fashioned smacking on the behind.

I've wondered to this day if any other kid, besides myself, ever had the notion to carry a puppy or kitten around in his/her mouth. Perhaps I'll create a poll on ATOT...

 

[Jules]

Going to jail when i was 8 years old because i was AWSOME.

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

my sister and i had free reign of the house on weekend morning b/c my parents liked to sleep in.... so we had a lot of time on our hands unsupervised... a few of the stupid stuff we did were:
eat all the flintstone vitamins
have milk drinking contests
get a big bowl of peanut butter and mix in lots of pancake syrup... eat while watching cartoons
eat a lot of the bayer children asperins
have a raw bacon eating contest (only did this once)
go bowling in the living room (yes we broke the tv)

 

[illusion88]

On the capri sun juice packs there is a little hole where you insert the straw. For some reason I used to always read it as "Instant straw" and I could never figure it out.

 

[thetxstang]

Also, Jeff7 reminded me of some of the words I had trouble pronouncing as a lad. Try as I might, I simply couldn't say the following words properly:

1) hamburger = "hamburber"
2) windmill = "innmall"
3) eleven = "elvin"
4) blanket = "lolly"

Also, rather than say, "I'm going to tell Mom on you!", it'd always come out as, "I'm going to ASK Mom on you!"

It's a good thing someone didn't try and teach me to say "pwned" back then.

 

[KingGheedora]

When I was in pre-school, I would look out the window during class, and I would see "floaters" (I think microscopic organisms living on the surface of your eye that you can see if you focus your eyes in a certain manner). Because of the intense effort necessary to see these, I thought I was actually developing super vision, and was actually seeing astronauts in space.

 

[state 08]

I thought the Speed Limit signs said, "SPEED LEMONS 50."
I was like, this make no sense what so ever. Teh hell are teh lemmons?!?!


I was also eternally confused whether or not Michael Jackson was black or white.

 

[Leros]

I used to mix up a few words:

lasagna = blazanna
Toys-R-Us = toys arrest

 

[angminas]

There was the time when I was about 4 that my brother taught me how to set a truck on fire. He taught me a lot of things like that. Thank goodness they didn't stick.

When I was 3 or so, I got mad at my Mom and decided to run away. So I grabbed my blankie and a few toys and stood out on the porch, convinced that our babysitter would come pick me up. I probably waited about 20 minutes. Mom was just inside the whole time. She asked me how I was going to get away and everything. I bet it was hard for her not to laugh at me.

When I was about 6, I went sleepwalking. I thought I was in the bathroom but I was actually in the kitchen. I made a mess

The first time I beat Super Mario Brothers, after innumerable attempts, I memorialized it by writing a whole page talking about how cool I was. I drew the little symbols that told in some crazy language how many extra lives I had. I dated it and added lots of exclamation points!!!! I think I expected a film crew to show up at any moment.

My friend and I both got new stuffed animals at the same time, but I liked his better than mine. So I took it and "tried to throw it across the fireplace, but not far enough". The fire was out, but it got ashes on it. They washed it and it didn't dry well and it mildewed. I still feel bad about that. Its name was Waldo I honestly thought I was just trying to throw it across- I guess I wasn't old enough to understand my envy. About 3-4 years old.

At about the same time, my Dad brought me and my brother home one day to find my Mom playing Space Invaders on our brand new Atari 2600. They had pooled $200 to buy it for us- a large amount of money for poor people in 1980. We played that thing into the dust, and then the next one, and the next one. What's funny is, I don't think I ever saw her play that game again.

Ah, memories. I miss my Dad. I remember him taking off his shirt and having Mom check his back where it ached. He died of cancer about a year later.

 

[gerwen]

Originally posted by: thetxstang
<snip>

I've wondered to this day if any other kid, besides myself, ever had the notion to carry a puppy or kitten around in his/her mouth. Perhaps I'll create a poll on ATOT...

You're not alone.

Unrelated memory:
When i was a somewhere between 6 and 9, i saw Jaws for the first time. Scared the bejeesus outta me. I slept in the middle of my bed for months, fear turning it into a boat, and if i got close to the edge, Jaws would get me.

 

[Juno]

stole bunch of $1 bills from mom's briefcase to buy candies. mom found it gone and asked where it was. i was so evil.

my brother and i had a brilliant idea of polishing the kitchen floor with soap and water so we could slide into from living room.

 

[thetxstang]

I have the feeling this could be the makings of a really great thread, so...

^ for the daytime crowd.

 

[leftyman]

Originally posted by: HamburgerBoy
When I was younger I used to think my nose was a bug on my face and would smack it a lot.

Your momma taught you that?

 

[mooglekit]

Not so much something I remember as a couple stories from my childhood...

When I was 2 I decided I wanted a little snack, but rather than opening up the fridge in our house I walked over the the neighbors and waltzed right in to open up their fridge

Also, got up one morning that same year and pulled out a bunch of pots and pans and broke some eggs thinking I'd make breakfast (lucky I didn't know how to turn on the stove yet...)

I must have been a really hungry kid

 

[SlowSpyder]

When I was a little kid I remember my parents talking about someone getting fired from their job. I thought this meant that they were brought out to the parking lot and lit on fire for doing a bad job. I always hoped my mom and dad did a good job at work.

 

[Lola]

Yea, i had a lot of stuff in my memories...

I grew up in Detroit and my grandma took care of my brother and I. We had a nice fenced in backyard by my gramma was still paranoid that we were going to get kidnapped so in the wintertime, when we wanted to go out and play in the snow she would not let us. So instead she brought buckets of snow in the bathtub and we used it to build snowmen that way!

We also always went camping in Northern Michigan. On the way driving there, there was this bilboard with a huge Santa statue next to it for an ad.
As a treat, as my grandpa was driving past it, opened the car window and held out his hand and pretended to "catch" an envelope from Santa that had $5 in in for me to spend while we were camping.

I have so many vivid fond and sad memories of childhood i want to write a book... but i keep putting it off!

 

[MrPickins]

I remember being about 5 years old, and being sent to my room for being bad.
I was pretty mad about it, so I grabbed a red crayon and scrawled "F*** You Mom!" in 3 foot tall letters on my wall.

I still remember the surprised look on my mom's face that turned into howling laughter.

Somehow I didn't get punished for that one.

Although, I'm sure all my childhood deviousness will be payed back to me by my children.

 

[eakers]

Watching Scooby Doo used to give me horrible nightmares but I would throw a huge temper tantrum if my parents didn't let me watch it.

I was afraid of alf LOL