Computer oxymorons I'm tired of dealing with

[Fritzo]

I refuse to upgrade from a dialup connection because I never use the computer. However I will call you every 2 days to complain that that web pages take 5 minutes to show up.

I want a Mac because I want to be different than everyone else. Wait....why can't I run things on my computer like everyone else?

I'm old and know nothing about computers. To learn about them, my son gave me a half working 12 year old computer with 32MB of memory running Windows ME, then he went back home 4 states away.

 

[rivan]

Repost.

 

[SirStev0]

Repost.

this.

 

[F1N3ST]

Really

 

[GodlessAstronomer]

Program X uses 800mb of memory. This is an outrage, I demand to have that 800mb of memory sitting idle doing nothing.

 

[Red Squirrel]

I hate the excuse "I'm not really computer savvy" well why do you have a computer then if you're unwilling to learn how to use it?

 

[crownjules]

These are not oxymorons.

Microsoft Works is a computer-related oxymoron.

 

[3chordcharlie]

These are not oxymorons.

Microsoft Works is a computer-related oxymoron.

I can't believe it took until post #7 for this.

 

[MagnusTheBrewer]

I do support for the older non tech savvy crowd and I like it.

It's all about how you talk about computing. First, computers ARE terribly complex and programs/OS ARE horrifically unintuitive.

The folks I help don't care about the latest and greatest. They don't care about doing something "better." They want a visual example of a different way of doing what they are doing now and the cost, period.

In short, they're interested in their uses for computers and don't give a fig about the 'how.' They expect me to know the ins and outs so, I always present them with choices and the pros and cons of each.

All while drinking coffee and eating cookies they provide. Oh yeah, they always pay in cash.

 

[Fritzo]

Repost.

this.

WTF are you talking about, I just made these up from my experiences last week.

 

[Demon-Xanth]

WTF are you talking about, I just made these up from my experiences last week.

Welcome to the internet. As a computer geek who hasn't learned how to use the phrase "Sorry, I'm not very good with computers." yet, you can find your dignity and soul down the hall, past the bathroom drowning where it's sorrows with surrogate alcohol with the rest of ours.

 

[Bl0cks]

Welcome to the internet. As a computer geek who hasn't learned how to use the phrase "Sorry, I'm not very good with computers."

how did this get here?

 

[hanoverphist]

Welcome to the internet. As a computer geek who hasn't learned how to use the phrase "Sorry, I'm not very good with computers." yet, you can find your dignity and soul down the hall, past the bathroom drowning where it's sorrows with surrogate alcohol with the rest of ours.

i prefer the line "thats cool, my family rate is 45 an hour. let me know when you want me to help."

 

[rivan]

WTF are you talking about, I just made these up from my experiences last week.

Because they've each been complained about many times.

 

[Fritzo]

Because they've each been complained about many times.

Ohhh...I see...you made up the rule that if someone has a similar experience to someone else, you make it a repost. Gotcha.

That should be fun for you to enforce.

 

[bas1c]

I think you need to look up the definition for "oxymoron". The word you are looking for is "moron".

 

[kalrith]

WTF are you talking about, I just made these up from my experiences last week.

Just because you "made something up" doesn't mean that no one else has. Yesterday I went to patent something called "the wheel" and was laughed out of the office. I guess someone came up with that invention already, but I swear I just made it up last week .

 

[PlasmaBomb]

Ohhh...I see...you made up the rule that if someone has a similar experience to someone else, you make it a repost. Gotcha.

That should be fun for you to enforce.

U r A lifer... you should know the rules!

 

[Electric Amish]

I think you need to look up the definition for "oxymoron". The word you are looking for is "moron".

Isn't that when you make an "ox" out of you and a moron?


...something like that

 

[rivan]

Ohhh...I see...you made up the rule that if someone has a similar experience to someone else, you make it a repost. Gotcha.

That should be fun for you to enforce.

I'd make a post with all the rules, but it'd probably be a repost.

 

[gsellis]

i prefer the line "thats cool, my family rate is 45 an hour. let me know when you want me to help."

45 an hour?!? That is a LOT of beer.

 

[Kev]

Is using "oxymoron" when you should be using "moron" an oxymoron? Or is it just plain irony?

I think my brain just exploded.

 

[SirStev0]

WTF are you talking about, I just made these up from my experiences last week.

And you are about the millionth person this week to have this complaint.

 

[fleabag]

Program X uses 800mb of memory. This is an outrage, I demand to have that 800mb of memory sitting idle doing nothing.

wow you're a moron....

 

[Suspicious-Teach8788]

oxymorons are 2 words that conflict... i.e. Microsoft Works

anything more, it's a paradox. An oxymoron is a 2 word paradox.