Reports of my demise are greatly exaggerated. My colon was pure and fresh. It is not, repeat, not dirt nap time.
Colonscopy Results
- Thread starter Carbo
- Start date
Good news for me, that is. Bad news for my in laws and the various mooches and skunks that litter my life. 
Originally posted by: ROTC1983
What the heck
That's the after pic from after the procedure. eewww
pillage2001
Lifer
- Sep 18, 2000
- 14,038
- 1
- 81
To Quote Robin Williams, "You become your own discovery channel. 'Here we are going up Robin.' Do you people know what it is, it is a rotor-rooter, and it is going up you." (From Robin Williams: Live On Broadway)
pillage2001
Lifer
- Sep 18, 2000
- 14,038
- 1
- 81
It's a fine tube from what I know and when they shove it up, you're half asleep? My dad did it before but forgot what he told me.
SarcasticDwarf
Diamond Member
- Jun 8, 2001
- 9,574
- 2
- 76
Originally posted by: pillage2001
It's a fine tube from what I know and when they shove it up, you're half asleep? My dad did it before but forgot what he told me.
Whats SOOOOOOOOOOO much worse is when they shove that tube up the other end.....
Whatever you do, do not let your doc suspect you have a kidney stone!
- Oct 28, 1999
- 62,484
- 8,345
- 126
Ooooh cystoscopy. Been there, done that, bought the tshirt.
For different reasons though.
The doctor thought he was being helpful when he spun that thing around and asked me if I wanted to see what the inside of my bladder looked like.
SarcasticDwarf
Diamond Member
- Jun 8, 2001
- 9,574
- 2
- 76
I hope they gave you meds *cringes at the memory*
Items are NOT supposed to go that direction through it!
SarcasticDwarf
Diamond Member
- Jun 8, 2001
- 9,574
- 2
- 76
pillage2001
Lifer
- Sep 18, 2000
- 14,038
- 1
- 81
In summation, boys, it is a day and a half of fasting. Nothing but water and three mega-laxatives to cleanse the colon so thoroughly that I had some local Hindus making comments that I was cleaner than the Ganges.
You are on the porcelain god frequently during this time. The sludge gradually gives way to tea.
Finally, the moment arrives. The good doc and his bevy of pretty nurses prep me. I'm given a general anesthesia which puts me out in about forty seconds. I sleep the sleep of the other side.
I awaken about thirty minutes later with abdominal cramps that no woman in her worst PMS episode could imagine. I beckon the pretty nurse with my cries of anguish, who promptly tells me to roll over on my side and let out the gas. Apparently, the procedure includes a fill up to expand the colon. Gas passes, so does the discomfort. That was the only discomfort in the entire procedure.
Doc Adler strolls by ten minutes later with a golf club in his hand. Tells me he hasn't seen a pinker, cleaner colon in years. I feel pretty.
Suddenly, though, I have an inexplicable urge to call my neighbor, Guillermo. He's a flight attendant. Is this a side effect I'm not familiar with??
Bottom line: I'll be around a few more years to muckrake here at ATOT.
You are on the porcelain god frequently during this time. The sludge gradually gives way to tea.
Finally, the moment arrives. The good doc and his bevy of pretty nurses prep me. I'm given a general anesthesia which puts me out in about forty seconds. I sleep the sleep of the other side.
I awaken about thirty minutes later with abdominal cramps that no woman in her worst PMS episode could imagine. I beckon the pretty nurse with my cries of anguish, who promptly tells me to roll over on my side and let out the gas. Apparently, the procedure includes a fill up to expand the colon. Gas passes, so does the discomfort. That was the only discomfort in the entire procedure.
Doc Adler strolls by ten minutes later with a golf club in his hand. Tells me he hasn't seen a pinker, cleaner colon in years. I feel pretty.
Suddenly, though, I have an inexplicable urge to call my neighbor, Guillermo. He's a flight attendant. Is this a side effect I'm not familiar with??
Bottom line: I'll be around a few more years to muckrake here at ATOT.
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