Cat Haiku

[Azraele]

To all you cat lovers...

You never feed me.
Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
And that will show you.

You must scratch me there!
Yes, above my tail! Behold,
Elevator butt.

I need a new toy.
Tail of a black dog keeps good time.
Pounce! Good dog! Good dog!

The rule for today.
Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
New rule tomorrow.

In deep sleep hear sound
Cat vomit hairball somewhere.
Will find in morning.

Grace personified
I leap into the window
I meant to do that.

Blur of motion, then-
Silence, me, a paper bag
What is so funny?

The mighty hunter
Returns with gifts of plump birds
Your foot just squashed one.

You're always typing
Well, let's see you ignore me
Sitting on your hands.

My small cardboard box
You cannot see me if I
Can just hide my head.

Terrible battle
I fought for hours. Come and see!
What's a term paper?

Kitty likes plastic
Confuses for litter box
Don't leave tarp around.

Small brave carnivores
Kill pine cones and mosquitos
Fear vacuum cleaner

Want to trim my claws?
Don't even think about it!
My yelps wake the dead.

I want to be close
to you. Can I fit my head
inside your armpit?

Wanna go outside.
Oh, no! Help! I got outside!
Let me back inside!

Oh no! My Big One
has been trapped by newspaper.
Cat to the rescue.

Humans are so strange.
Mine lies still in bed, then screams!
My claws aren't that sharp...

Cats meow out of angst
"Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!
We could break so much."

Litter box not here
You moved it on me again
I'll crap in the sink

The Big Ones snore now
Every room is dark and cold
Time for "Cup Hockey"

We're almost equals
I purr to show I love you
Want to smell my butt?

 

[Linflas]

Very good. Living amongst a number of cats I have seen every one .

 

[Azraele]

Having spent much of my life with cats, I'm very familiar with their quirks as well

 

[Elita1]

LMAO!!!!!!
how true that haiku is!!
It makes me want a kitty now...

 

[Linflas]

We have 3 ferals we are currently trying to socialize, interested? My wife rescued them from a storm drain before Christmas and we are still trying to get them used to people. Kittens are so fun to watch. We did find out that our vet made an error and one of the she's was a he (now he is an it) but fortunately he was not mature enough to have blessed us with more kittens.

 

[thebestMAX]

So true, so true.

My guy has done every one of those.

Thanks for the laugh.

 

[Azraele]

<<We have 3 ferals we are currently trying to socialize, interested>>

Sorry I've got my hands full I currently am feeding/caring for (in addition to my mine) the neighobor's cat who got abandoned when they moved. Unfortunately she is pregnant so I will have to find homes for all the kittens and then she will get fixed so that can't happen again. I hate it that her family just left her like that :| I'm also caring for the other neighbor's cat, who is really not suited for outdoor life. He's just not built to withstand the toms that prowl the area, so he's often in the room I keep for him recouping from moderate to severe puncture wounds from bites from other cats.

 

[RaDragon]

I got this from a website with the Haiku-O-Matic:

The mothership lands
It's come to take me away!
Wait! who'll feed the cats?!

 

[Zoltar]

This thread makes me want pussycat!

 

[Namuna]

I'm bop'n nock'n.
Everybodies rock'n,
neuter your pussy.