Cat-5 Question (only serious techies should venture into this thread)

[gUEv]

After running a series of benchmark tests, I am still bamboolzed (to say the least) about what color CAT-5 cable will give me maximum performance. After seveeral hours of searching, i have narrowed down my final competitors to Red and Grey.

Red-..obviously a bit more flashy, perhaps this could attract women at LAN parties. After extensive review, i noticed a 02.43% descrease in latency times, yet a higher rate of packetloss. Now- should i go with the devil-may-care attitude that is this three feet of fiery red cable, risk it all in a high stakes game of low pings and high packetloss,or should i go with...

Grey-..the old regime, the old way. As i said before, my pings were substantially higher, but I'm playing it safe, going the beaten path. Although the James Dean factor of this particular cable is substantially lower, I will most likely get respect from the older, wiser techs, for i am using a tried and true formula for success....i am using grey!

There was a purple option, but i fear ridicule about my sexual orientation if i were to purchase such.

Any comments, benchmarks or advice would be appreciated.

 

[Buddha Bart]

if it weren't for the topic, i would assume this is a joke...

For your sake, I still will, Hah!

bart

 

[Stealth1024]

Go with some high quality Belkin CAT5e cable, blue cable that is.

 

[Fathom4]

All things being equal the color of your cable will have as much affect on Lan performance as adding gauges to your car makes it run faster. Nada.

 

[Homer]

Whoa! Someone moved this thread while I was replying to it. One moment I'm in GH, the next I'm out on the sidewalk. What a rush!

This is "satire", folks. Almost a sort of nasty pr0n in a technical forum...

I would also go with the Blue cable. Excellent signal strength, minimal packet loss, combined with better than average pings. Identifies you as solid, good parenting material and provider, 100% male.

If you can't get Blue get White. Slightly slower, otherwise similar to Blue, conveys an additional air of purity.

 

[lowtech1]

Nef,

Green cable might give you the best performance, because it the same as the trafic light for go.

Or, you could go for blue that may get you a promotion from a Help-Desk to Janitor, because it go well with the corporate theme.

Also, pink could be interesting, because you can double duty it as a 11 rung neck tie at an E party.

Other wise I could stick with the black cable, because you can use it at your S&M dungeon.

 

[kranky]

Take a tip from the rice boys. You need a racing stripe on your cable and some decals on the connectors. Apparently, when these things are done to some cars, they go much faster.

 

[Killbat]

My LAN party "festive" cable is transparent. You can look right in on all the colors of the individual conductors. It covers 50ft, and it always delivers the lowest ping at any event.

 

[abracadabra1]

be dangerous- yank that red!

 

[IBhacknU]

Well,

encouraged by your findings, I ran the same series of benchmark tests.

I was excited to find you misplaced your decimal. There is only a 0.0243% descrease in latency times!

 

[Mday]

wtf

this has to be the dumbest question i have ever seen.

must've took you a while to come up with it..

 

[Mday]

i have red, blue and one black cable.

 

[jonnyGURU]

I thought CAT-5 was for really really suck ass road bikers.

 

[IBhacknU]

LOL johnnyGURU

as a former CAT2 racer, that was pretty funny!

 

[Valhalla1]

but... no one cares.

Wiseass.. err.. guy. er.. gUEv or whatever your calling yourself these days

 

[Windogg]

I just have a little midget carry messages back and forth between users through the airducts. Cost me less than a case of good plenum CAT5.

Windogg

 

[Soybomb]

I've seen the best performance increase by going with yellow. You should also wrap the cable in a coil, it will help accelerate the data.

 

[jonnyGURU]

IBhacknU: Thought that joke might've gotten lost on this bunch!

 

[Moonbeam]

In San Francisco, we use tie-dyed cat6 shielded cable for its gig speed. If your're going to visit be sure to wear some in your hair.

 

[bigvince]

while an obvious attemp at winning the favor of the members of this board with inteligent stupidity, it still reeks of NEF and as such cannot be taken into account when reffering to this member:frown::Q

 

[Viperoni]

Cat 5 "e" or cat 7

 

[gUEv]

perhaps i should clarify.....
it's good to see that some of us have retained our sense of humor. it's good to see our hearts haven't turned black by using the internet (-george w bush).
this was, in fact, a joke, if this sailed over your head, you might need to lighten up a bit. this was not posting to gain favor of the uber-|337 other forum members, frankly i really couldnt give less of a sh1t what you all think of me, considering i will most likley never meet any of you and/or develop an intense, passionate, cyber romance with anyone here either. jokes are made to make people laugh, and i'm glad i suceeded with a few of you. that was the purpose of this thread, nothing more.

so bigvince, mday- perhaps you should lighten up a bit, take time to simply smirk at this joke instead of looking for the worst in it and it's author, maybe go take a walk outside or something.

and to all those who responded to this thread properly- you restored my faith in humantiy for a split second

 

[Valhalla1]

what has this forum come to? this is rediculous..

guev - dont worry, I still lub j00

 

[Chooie]

I love you guys

 

[Paladinexe]

Set up 2 computers. Each with 2 NICS. Use 2 different color cables and see which computer gets full first. Then you know which is faster.