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can u help me.....

wobbuffet

Banned
this sentence..to make it better... thanks ppl

In addition to the smashed up and rotten brain, there are several possible consequences of brain damage. That is memory loss, becoming blind, a vegetable, or retarded.

:cookie:
 
Several consequences of brain damage are memory loss, blindness, retardation, and a vegitative state.

Several consequences of brain damage are the following: memory loss, blindness, retardation, and a vegitative state.

Completely omit the "in addition" part. Saying "smashed up and rotten brain" in a formal paper is just... childish.
 
in addition to physical brain damage, some possible consequences of head trauma includes memory loss, blindness, or mental retardation

that is all i can help. now i have to go back to my own paper =(

by the way how old are you?
 
I like what Nik suggested, here is another (and probably shitty) suggestion

Brain damage may result in numerous symptoms including memory loss, blindness, retardation, and a vegitative state.
 
Originally posted by: sniperruff
in addition to physical brain damage, some possible consequences of head trauma includes memory loss, blindness, or mental retardation

that is all i can help. now i have to go back to my own paper =(

by the way how old are you?
*holds up fingers* This many!
 
How come most of you guys are omitting the "Smashed up and Rotten" part of the original sentence? 🙁 That was my mostest favorite partest of it!!
 
Originally posted by: MrCodeDude
How come most of you guys are omitting the "Smashed up and Rotten" part of the original sentence? 🙁 That was my mostest favorite partest of it!!

it is excellent if you have a pumpkin above your neck
 
first: i am not sure if vegetative state is a proper term

second: In Sarah?s case for instance, she was the prettiest girl in the whole Wilson High School. She had beautiful silky blonde hair with radiant blue eyes. Her satiny white skin was always flavored with cherry lotion. The aromatic smell of her body attracted every guy she passed by.

- this sounds like something skywalker66 would write

third:she became mentally retarded. Her eyes were no longer shimmering but glued with yellow, greenish gum. Her greasy tangled hair was full of head louse and its damp smell was as bad as a dead body decaying in the dumpster on a hot summer day. When she belched and drooled on her salty shirt, funguses fell off from her cheeks

- please tell me either this is a joke or you are in middle school...

 
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