British Military Enlists Its First Satanist

MisfitsFiend

Platinum Member
Jun 19, 2001
2,287
1
0
/me puts on flamesuit and get popcorn ready :)

LONDON (Reuters) - Britain's Armed Forces have enlisted their first Satanist after a naval technician serving on a frigate was granted permission to practice his beliefs while at sea, the Ministry of Defense said Sunday.



Defending the decision to allow a Satanist among the Royal Navy's ranks, a ministry spokesman said it was an "equal opportunities employer" and did not discriminate against specific religious beliefs.


"He went to his commanding officer with a request to practice his beliefs on board his ship and it was granted ... We believe he is the first avowed Satanist to serve in the military, but there is no official register of beliefs," the spokesman said.


The Sunday Telegraph newspaper said Chris Cranmer, 24, from Edinburgh, Scotland would be allowed to have a funeral carried out by the Church of Satan should he be killed in action.


The Church of Satan was founded in the 1960s, but Satanism can refer to a diverse set of practices that include viewing Satan as a force of nature.


Members of the church, which rejects Christian ideas of God and the Devil, follow 11 Satanic Rules of the Earth.


The belief system has been condemned as a cult by some religious groups and at least one opposition politician expressed dismay after Cranmer won permission to practice Satanism aboard a Royal Navy ship.


"I am utterly shocked by this," said Conservative parliamentarian Anne Widdecombe.


"Satanism is wrong. Obviously the private beliefs of individuals anywhere including the armed forces are their own affair but I hope it doesn't spread," she said.




 

amdforever2

Golden Member
Sep 19, 2002
1,879
0
0
Wiccans are just kids mad at their parents.


Satanists are the same thing, but from the 70s or 80s.









;)
 

Arkitech

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2000
8,356
4
76
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.
 

Mo0o

Lifer
Jul 31, 2001
24,227
3
76
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.
 

Arkitech

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2000
8,356
4
76
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.
 

Beau

Lifer
Jun 25, 2001
17,730
0
76
www.beauscott.com
just fyi, the 11 satanic rules are:

1. Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.

2. Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear them.

3. When in another?s lair, show him respect or else do not go there.

4. If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.

5. Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.

6. Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the other person and he cries out to be relieved.

7. Acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it successfully to obtain your desires. If you deny the power of magic after having called upon it with success, you will lose all you have obtained.

8. Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.

9. Do not harm little children.

10. Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.

11. When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask him to stop. If he does not stop, destroy him.

:D
 

Mo0o

Lifer
Jul 31, 2001
24,227
3
76
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Pot calling the kettle black, how is his religious practice any of your business. You get mad when atheists make fun of Christianity, and now you're being hypocritical and commenting on someone else's religion. At least he is devout in his religion compared to more than 50% of christians i know who only follow the convenient rules and play the "save me jesus" card for the ones they cant.
 

OffTopic1

Golden Member
Feb 12, 2004
1,764
0
0

Didn't Christ teaching is to turn the other cheek? And, for some odd reason the Brits & have an army that teaches people to kill.

He belive in the Church of Satanism, and peruse on the internet concluded that their law is "Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law," "Love is the Law, love under will."

It sound like the mind set of the majority of the world population.
 

Codewiz

Diamond Member
Jan 23, 2002
5,758
0
76
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Well just considering, you don't realize that they DO NOT worship a being called Satan, I am not surprised you have little respect for someone else's beliefs.

I think it is a bit stupid that the "religion" is called Satanism since it is closer to Atheism. Satanist do not believe is a God or the devil. It just seems to me that they picked the term Satanism to piss of Christians.
 

Arkitech

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2000
8,356
4
76
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Pot calling the kettle black, how is his religious practice any of your business. You get mad when atheists make fun of Christianity, and now you're being hypocritical and commenting on someone else's religion. At least he is devout in his religion compared to more than 50% of christians i know who only follow the convenient rules and play the "save me jesus" card for the ones they cant.

Cool your jet engines sparky. I can guarantee you've never seen me upset about atheist teasing christians, especially since I'm agnostic.

I take it you're a servant of the dark one

 

Mo0o

Lifer
Jul 31, 2001
24,227
3
76
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Pot calling the kettle black, how is his religious practice any of your business. You get mad when atheists make fun of Christianity, and now you're being hypocritical and commenting on someone else's religion. At least he is devout in his religion compared to more than 50% of christians i know who only follow the convenient rules and play the "save me jesus" card for the ones they cant.

Cool your jet engines sparky. I can guarantee you've never seen me upset about atheist teasing christians, especially since I'm agnostic.

I take it you're a servant of the dark one

No i'm not but i also dont criticize someone else's religion especially since hes obviously devout enough to follow it and risk discrimination.
 

gigapet

Lifer
Aug 9, 2001
10,005
0
76
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: gigapet
those are not so bad rules to follow.......what is the matting signal by the way......

flashing of the genitals

does that include them allowing you to remove the panties?
 

Arkitech

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2000
8,356
4
76
Originally posted by: Codewiz
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Well just considering, you don't realize that they DO NOT worship a being called Satan, I am not surprised you have little respect for someone else's beliefs.

I think it is a bit stupid that the "religion" is called Satanism since it is closer to Atheism. Satanist do not believe is a God or the devil. It just seems to me that they picked the term Satanism to piss of Christians.

you people can't take a joke today I see.

Ah well excuse me while I go worship my toaster.

Oh mighty warmer of bread I beseech you
 

Arkitech

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2000
8,356
4
76
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Pot calling the kettle black, how is his religious practice any of your business. You get mad when atheists make fun of Christianity, and now you're being hypocritical and commenting on someone else's religion. At least he is devout in his religion compared to more than 50% of christians i know who only follow the convenient rules and play the "save me jesus" card for the ones they cant.

Cool your jet engines sparky. I can guarantee you've never seen me upset about atheist teasing christians, especially since I'm agnostic.

I take it you're a servant of the dark one

No i'm not but i also dont criticize someone else's religion especially since hes obviously devout enough to follow it and risk discrimination.

humourless crowd today


 

Mo0o

Lifer
Jul 31, 2001
24,227
3
76
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Pot calling the kettle black, how is his religious practice any of your business. You get mad when atheists make fun of Christianity, and now you're being hypocritical and commenting on someone else's religion. At least he is devout in his religion compared to more than 50% of christians i know who only follow the convenient rules and play the "save me jesus" card for the ones they cant.

Cool your jet engines sparky. I can guarantee you've never seen me upset about atheist teasing christians, especially since I'm agnostic.

I take it you're a servant of the dark one

No i'm not but i also dont criticize someone else's religion especially since hes obviously devout enough to follow it and risk discrimination.

humourless crowd today

if you were trying to make a joke then you should try to be funnier so people know you're actually joking
 

Arkitech

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2000
8,356
4
76
Originally posted by: gigapet
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: gigapet
those are not so bad rules to follow.......what is the matting signal by the way......

flashing of the genitals

does that include them allowing you to remove the panties?

depends on the panties. thongs = yes, gstring = yes, grannie panties = no
 

Codewiz

Diamond Member
Jan 23, 2002
5,758
0
76
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Codewiz
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Well just considering, you don't realize that they DO NOT worship a being called Satan, I am not surprised you have little respect for someone else's beliefs.

I think it is a bit stupid that the "religion" is called Satanism since it is closer to Atheism. Satanist do not believe is a God or the devil. It just seems to me that they picked the term Satanism to piss of Christians.

you people can't take a joke today I see.

Ah well excuse me while I go worship my toaster.

Oh mighty warmer of bread I beseech you


I don't give a crap one way or another about what you believe or what the Satanist believes. I just pride myself in not running my mouth when I am totally ignorant on the subject. If you had bothered to even real the article you would have realized the "religion" doesn't worship any being.

In your case, Ignorance is bliss.......
 

Arkitech

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2000
8,356
4
76
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
Originally posted by: Mo0o
Originally posted by: Arkitech
that's just retarded

why would a grown man admit to being a satanist? someone should slap that guy around with a bible, a quaran and the talmud and tell him to throw away his Kiss records.

maybe he really does believe in it.

oh great lord of the darkness, I beseech you to hear my evil prayers. please grant your loyal servant of evil unlimited access to internet porn.


for some reason I just can't take satanism seriously as a religion.

Pot calling the kettle black, how is his religious practice any of your business. You get mad when atheists make fun of Christianity, and now you're being hypocritical and commenting on someone else's religion. At least he is devout in his religion compared to more than 50% of christians i know who only follow the convenient rules and play the "save me jesus" card for the ones they cant.

Cool your jet engines sparky. I can guarantee you've never seen me upset about atheist teasing christians, especially since I'm agnostic.

I take it you're a servant of the dark one

No i'm not but i also dont criticize someone else's religion especially since hes obviously devout enough to follow it and risk discrimination.

humourless crowd today

if you were trying to make a joke then you should try to be funnier so people know you're actually joking

duly noted sir

i will follow your example in all things comedic