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Big-rig with 44,000 pounds of Miller High Life beer stolen from truck stop

I'm not admitting anything but there may be an awesome party at my place this weekend. Alky is invited and I expect him to polish off at least 10000 lbs.
 
Daddy, you're about to have your evening ruined for you.
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vi edit said:
Checks state.

Yup.

Florida.

😀
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Florida..... :biggrin:

florida.gif


It's not the first time a semi has been stolen in Florida. About 180,000 eggs were stolen earlier this year in Fort Myers. A truck with Hershey chocolate was also stolen in December in Volusia County, and a truck with Slimfast was swiped near downtown Orlando.

Just when Thomas thought he lost everything, he received a phone call telling him the truck and most of the cargo had been located.
"Oh, my God. That's beautiful," he said.
The call came in from detectives that the truck had been found in Miami.
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T9D said:
Might have well just stolen a truck load of porta-potties. Probably better tasting piss.
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Just thought about that I would instantly jump up and run to the liquor store for a 4 pack of Hoptimum. Then I thought about lots of cheap beer to drink and that I would be like sort of tiredly time to go get booze and get shitfaced. This was some minutes ago. Then I just now came back to this topic and thought about all of that worthless booze those guys have right now.
 
Inside the truck was 44,000 pounds of Miller High Life, which comes out to about 9,700 four-packs.
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So it was about 44,000 pounds of beer...
Who measures beer in "pounds"? Can you use a measure people will identify with?
OK, so it was about 9,700 four-packs...
Four-packs? Does Miller Lite even offer their beer in four-packs?
No, but I thought that would be easier than saying 1,600 cases, which would be what was actually stolen and therefore give people too clear a picture of what exactly we're referring to...
 
Miller High Life.

Think about that for a moment.

Let it settle in.

Okay, we good?

Now let me come up with the only pisswater that could possibly be worse:

Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Yup, I went there.

P-fuckin-BR.
 
Atomic Playboy said:
So it was about 44,000 pounds of beer...
Who measures beer in "pounds"? Can you use a measure people will identify with?
OK, so it was about 9,700 four-packs...
Four-packs? Does Miller Lite even offer their beer in four-packs?
No, but I thought that would be easier than saying 1,600 cases, which would be what was actually stolen and therefore give people too clear a picture of what exactly we're referring to...
Click to expand...

Make the headline as big as possible. Go for ounces "160,000 ounces of beer was stolen..."
 
SunnyD said:
Miller High Life.

Think about that for a moment.

Let it settle in.

Okay, we good?

Now let me come up with the only pisswater that could possibly be worse:

Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Yup, I went there.

P-fuckin-BR.
Click to expand...

Old Milwaukee, Natty Light and Keystone would disagree with that remark.
 
Atomic Playboy said:
So it was about 44,000 pounds of beer...
Who measures beer in "pounds"? Can you use a measure people will identify with?
OK, so it was about 9,700 four-packs...
Four-packs? Does Miller Lite even offer their beer in four-packs?
No, but I thought that would be easier than saying 1,600 cases, which would be what was actually stolen and therefore give people too clear a picture of what exactly we're referring to...
Click to expand...

Trucks haul by weight, not by container contents.
 
Atomic Playboy said:
So it was about 44,000 pounds of beer...
Who measures beer in "pounds"? Can you use a measure people will identify with?
OK, so it was about 9,700 four-packs...
Four-packs? Does Miller Lite even offer their beer in four-packs?
No, but I thought that would be easier than saying 1,600 cases, which would be what was actually stolen and therefore give people too clear a picture of what exactly we're referring to...
Click to expand...

Ugh, Imperial units... If they used kilos, I'd approximate the volume using the density of water. But then I wouldn't understand what a kilo weighs without converting to pounds -- damn you metric/Imperial hybrid.
 
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