Best friend of 20 years died yesterday .. numb

Damn Dirty Ape

Diamond Member
Nov 1, 1999
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He was a quadraplegic, 55. We met about 20 years ago when I went to his house to do a service call on a laptop. Became good friends, best friends.

He went to bed last night with a sore throat, his caregiver found him this morning. He gave me a lot of sage advice when things in my life weren't right and encouragement too.

I was supposed to go over last Monday and 'shoot the shiat' for a few hours but I came down with a bad head cold Sunday night and we both agreed it would be better to wait.

He always told me 'guys like me don't live to be old guys -- just realize that'..

I'm posting because I'm numb and don't know quite what to feel - I know he finally is free of his wheelchair though.

RIP Mark.

thanks for reading.
 

Damn Dirty Ape

Diamond Member
Nov 1, 1999
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Thanks - he was home on leave from the army when he was 21, car accident put him in the wheelchair as a quad some 35 years ago. Led a more full life than many people who walked. He was without a doubt the best friend I've had so far in life that was a male (wife of course being the female friend).

Just mind-numbing how quickly things can change forever. I can't even begin to count the hours that we'd just sit and talk about anything - how the warmer weather was bringing out the best female outfits of the year so far to the newest updates to an antivirus program to the kids that would cut through his yard and drop trash on the way home from school.

Last couple of weeks I've been dealing with a light depression, due to the shorter days and all, and I don't think this has really hit me completely. He watched both our kids grow up from birth and was there and spoke at my Dad's funeral, the singlemost traumatic thing that's happened so far in my life.

I remember my Sunday school teacher telling me 'if you have one or two truly good friends in your life, you're lucky'...

I've lost my best friend but he's better off now.

and to the poster.. yea he very much loved the female form. :)
 
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amdhunter

Lifer
May 19, 2003
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:(
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FelixDeCat

Lifer
Aug 4, 2000
30,091
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Wow you really did lose a good friend. I am sure however he wouldnt want to see you get too sad over his passing. He is probably in heaven having the time of his life right now.

Good luck and God bless.
 

PricklyPete

Lifer
Sep 17, 2002
14,582
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I'm genuinely sorry for you. Good friends like that are extremely important influences in our lives and I can only imagine the hurt you are feeling at the moment.

As you said, at least he is free of his wheel chair and likely in a better place. My sympathies to you.
 

Muse

Lifer
Jul 11, 2001
39,339
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Soar throat! He probably had heart attack. I had a soar throat a few weeks ago (think it was probably H1N1) and it was nasty. Barely got a fever but for a day or so I was miserable.

He preped you when he told you he wasn't likely to live to be old. Honor his memory and live a great life.

rose.gif
 

Damn Dirty Ape

Diamond Member
Nov 1, 1999
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Soar throat! He probably had heart attack. I had a soar throat a few weeks ago (think it was probably H1N1) and it was nasty. Barely got a fever but for a day or so I was miserable.

He preped you when he told you he wasn't likely to live to be old. Honor his memory and live a great life.

rose.gif

Yea, he told me that maybe 6 months after we met, always tried to keep that in mind. Of course that 'won't happen anytime soon', you know how people are a lot of times, me included.
 

Ausm

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
25,213
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Hey I feel for ya man, I have lost several people I have been close to and you feel like someone punched you in the gut. Just think of the good times you guys had together and this will help you make it through this difficult time.

Take care,

Ausm
 

Damn Dirty Ape

Diamond Member
Nov 1, 1999
3,310
0
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I'm genuinely sorry for you. Good friends like that are extremely important influences in our lives and I can only imagine the hurt you are feeling at the moment.

As you said, at least he is free of his wheel chair and likely in a better place. My sympathies to you.

I think it would be fair to say that outside the wife/kids and parents, he was the biggest (and best dammit) influence on me in the last 20.

Sitting here trying to tell myself I'm better off having had him as my closest friend and losing him, than to have never known him. I know sometimes when he'd be down he'd ask me to come by if I had the time and I'd usually make it somehow and before I'd leave he'd usually be feeling a lot better.

I hope my payback to him was even half of how he helped me out. If I was a drinker I'd go have a few tonight, but I'm not.
 

Adrenaline

Diamond Member
Jun 12, 2005
5,320
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Sorry for your loss. The best friend I ever had in my life was named Mark and he passed away in 2002 from a car accident at the age of 25. Reading this reminded me of a bunch of good times we had hanging out. Thanks.

We were friends since the age of 2, same age.
 
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