Bernie Madoff 'Falls out of bed' in prison

[Whoozyerdaddy]

http://abclocal.go.com/wtvd/story?section=news/local&id=7187293

He must have 'fallen out of bed' several times...
Couldn't happen to a nicer guy. Better stap in next time, eh Bernie?

DURHAM, NC -- A source tells ABC11 Eyewitness News that disgraced financier Bernie Madoff is being treated for serious injuries after he fell out of his prison bed.

Sources also confirmed Madoff was treated at Duke University Medical Center in Durham last Friday and discharged earlier this week.

He is serving a life sentence at the federal prison in Butner after admitting to cheating investors out of billions of dollars.

According to the sources, Madoff came to Duke with facial fractures, broken ribs and a collapsed lung. (HAHA... WTF?)

Prison officials won't confirm that. They say the 71-year-old is now in the medical clinic at the prison in Butner.

According a report by the Associated Press, Madoff's lawyer - Ira Sorkin - said his client was not assaulted, but "had some dizzy spells and some high blood pressure."

The AP reported Duke University Medical Center earlier said Madoff had been treated there, but later a spokeswoman said the hospital had never had a patient by that name.

 

[ahenkel]

You think he tried to off himself by falling out of the top bunk onto his face?

 

[Eli]

Facial fractures, broken rib and a collapsed lung from falling off a bunk?

Uh, doubt it. lol

 

[Whoozyerdaddy]

You think he tried to off himself by falling out of the top bunk onto his face?

That is the only logical conclusion any prison review board could possibly come to.

 

[venkman]

He didn't listen to daddy

 

[rasczak]

the queens cornered him in the shower and asked him to politely pick up the soap.

 

[Nik]

Sounds like he refused to "review someone's portfolio"

 

[SpatiallyAware]

That guy probably pissed off some very very powerful people

 

[Nik]

That guy probably pissed off some very very powerful people

Probably? He pissed off a metric fuckton of middle class.

 

[Whoozyerdaddy]

Probably? He pissed off a metric fuckton of middle class.

It's not his middle class victims he has to worry about... It's his multi-multi-multi gazillionaire clients. THOSE people didn't lose everything... They still have resources.

 

[SpatiallyAware]

It's not his middle class victims he has to worry about... It's his multi-multi-multi gazillionaire clients. THOSE people didn't lose everything... They still have resources.

Exactly..

I'm just saying that you know there are at least 1 or 2 people that lost a TON of money but probably had a good bit in other accounts or tied up in other ways

 

[rasczak]

Sounds like he refused to "give someone fellatio"

fixed

 

[herrjimbo]

it's a damn shame he didn't die.

 

[MikeyIs4Dcats]

I think it's plausible for an elderly man.

My grandmother broke her hip kneeling in her closet sorting her shoes.

 

[squirrel dog]

Nik , a metric fuckton is sig worthy .

 

[disappoint]

it's a damn shame he didn't die.

No it isn't. He ain't gettin off that easy. Unlike the queens....

 

[OILFIELDTRASH]

Not seeing the humor. Guy is spending the rest of his life in a prison. Is that not enough?

 

[prism]

Not seeing the humor. Guy is spending the rest of his life in a prison. Is that not enough?

Nope. For the countless lives that he ruined, I think he deserves the pain that he's thankfully receiving. Merry Christmas Bernie.

 

[F1N3ST]

Is Bernie Irish?

 

[Kadarin]

Not seeing the humor. Guy is spending the rest of his life in a prison. Is that not enough?

No, it's not enough.

 

[DrPizza]

Is his bunk on the 2nd story?

 

[brblx]

Probably? He pissed off a metric fuckton of middle class.

if you have enough money to just hand someone a bucketful and say 'turn it into more,' without ever questioning where your money is or what it's doing, you're either a) not middle class or b) a fucking rube.

'a fool and his money are easily parted' and whatnot. i can't comprehend why anyone has sympathy for the people madoff ripped off.

 

[0roo0roo]

pretty much....its hard to feel too sorry for his victims. they thought they got an inside deal"steal"

 

[bobdole369]

You think he tried to off himself by falling out of the top bunk onto his face?

I know of at least 3 guys that tried to get out of PT in the military by jumping out of the top bunk and landing on their knees.

 

[AlienCraft]

The groundwork is being laid out so that his death can be faked and he can be transported out of the country.
There is still too much money un-accounted for to be lax about ANYTHING involving a man with balls big enough to do what he did.
Faking a death would be elementary to his evil genius.