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ATTN: gender JOKE needed! ***UPDATE: i used one of the joke from here and i got a 68% on my speech***

I

iLoveDivX

Banned
UPDATE: i did the speech using the joke Q: What do you tell a woman w/ 2 black eyes? A: Nothing, you already told the b!tch twice! Well, i surveyed everyone in the class on whether or not they're women activist. there's only one person and it's the teacher, but i forgot to survey her. doh! i got a 68% on a speech from the teacher while the student evauluations (which don't count towards my grade) gave me excellent ratings. the speech was great but she docked off bunch of points due to the fact that i used the joke and i showed them a g-string for my visual aid. And because of thsoe two things, she docked points randomly at places that were fine or great. that b*tch.


preferably short. this is for my intro to my speech for a college class so i need this joke to be under 15 seconds. the speech is a persuasion speech why men are better than women. thanks.

OLD EDIT: when i say joke, i need something like a story. a short story joke that lasts no more than 15 seconds.

 
Why do all the dumb pretty women wear kneepads to work?
Because they are safety conscious!
 
Originally posted by: Mookow
Originally posted by: iLoveDivX
preferably short. this is for my intro to my speech so i need this joke to be under 15 seconds. thanks.
Click to expand...

how risque can the joke be?
Click to expand...

college speech class. no profanity. sexual subjects are ok i think. the speech is over why men are better than women.
 
Originally posted by: Evadman
Why do all the dumb pretty women wear kneepads to work?
Because they are safety conscious!
Click to expand...

What do you call a blonde with pigtails? A blow-job with handlebars


^--- my current favorite blonde joke
 
Originally posted by: iLoveDivX
Originally posted by: Mookow
Originally posted by: iLoveDivX
preferably short. this is for my intro to my speech so i need this joke to be under 15 seconds. thanks.
Click to expand...

how risque can the joke be?
Click to expand...

college speech class. no profanity. sexual subjects are ok i think. the speech is over why men are better than women.
Click to expand...

Post a copy of your intended speech, and I'll see how far this can go...
 
Well you've lost already. Everyone knows women are better than men, and thus control the world. It all has to do with a certain persuasive power they are given at birth. That's why we all end up whipped by them at one point or another.
 
Dude, you are fvcked! Women already rule the world. Think about it.

What do men want: Sex.

If men ruled the world you would get free sex if you make a purchase over $500 at the grocery store.
If men ruled the world you would get free sex when you sign up for a charge card.
If men ruled the world you would get free sex with every 5 hotel stays.
If men ruled the world sex from hot women would be a job requirement.

Obvioulsy Women rule the world. Sex is outlawed unless you are in your bedroom. (mostly 🙂 ) Fvck, you can't even say a dirty joke to another man @ work, because a women may overhear and then you get written up.

Women already rule the world. But God didn't want them to rule the world, so God gave them smaller brains so they would never understand that they do, in fact, rule the world.
 
Originally posted by: dtyn
Everyone knows women are better than men, and thus control the world. It all has to do with a certain persuasive power they are given at birth.
Click to expand...


It's called a vagina. Men want to use it, but the women are in control of it. It's like the US treasury and money. They realease it as they see fit to maintain the value and desire to have more of it. Oh... and it's the root of all evil.
 
Originally posted by: ness1469
Originally posted by: dtyn
Everyone knows women are better than men, and thus control the world. It all has to do with a certain persuasive power they are given at birth.
Click to expand...


It's called a vagina. Men want to use it, but the women are in control of it. It's like the US treasury and money. They realease it as they see fit to maintain the value and desire to have more of it. Oh... and it's the root of all evil.
Click to expand...

Oh so true . . . and another oldie but goodie - what do you call the flap of skin arond the vagina? A woamn.
 
Q: Why do women take longer than men to reach orgasm?

A: Who cares?



Q: How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house?

A: Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time.
 
Originally posted by: Jehovah
Q: Why do women take longer than men to reach orgasm?

A: Who cares?



Q: How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house?

A: Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time.
Click to expand...

LMFAO funniest joke ever
 
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