++ ATOT official NEF thread part IV ++

[WaTaGuMp]

Protecting the Queen's safety is a task that is gladly accepted by Police Squad. No matter how silly the idea of having a queen might be to us, as Americans, we must be gracious and considerate hosts.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Jane: How could you do something so vicious?

Vincent Ludwig: It was easy my dear. You forget, I spent two years as a building contractor.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Jane: How about a rain check?

Frank: Well, let's just stick to dinner.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Frank Drebin: Like a blind man at an orgy, I was going to have to feel things out.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Papshmir: My people are very upset.

Muriel Dillon: They're always upset. They're Arab terrorists.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Jane Spencer: You came highly recommended by our last therapist.

Dr. Stuart Eisendrath: Yes, I was sorry to hear about his suicide.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Ed Hocken: We heard about you and Jane.

Frank Drebin: Jane, Jane. That name will always remind me of her.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Frank Drebin: Well... We shot a lot of people together. It's been great. But today I retire, so if I do any shooting now, it'll have to be within the confines of my own home. Hopefully, an intruder and not an in-law, like at my bachelor party.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Rocco Dillon: Where's your prison number?

Frank Drebin: It's unlisted.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Frank Drebin: They're going to blow that place sky high. It'll be a tragedy. Unless it's during a dance number.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Rocco Dillon: [fires a gun over the heads of the audience] Freeze, and nobody gets hurt!

[a grip falls from the rafters into the orchestra]

Rocco Dillon: Well, from now on!

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Tanya Peters: What are you doing?

Frank Drebin: Oh! I was, uh, just conjugating my next move.

Tanya Peters: Your bishop's exposed.

Frank Drebin: It's these pants.

 

[bigboxes]

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Frank Drebin: Mrs. Dillon, your son is a ruthless, cold-blooded, sadistic animal. You must be proud of him.

Muriel Dillon: I am.

 

[bigboxes]

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Muriel Dillon: How's my little boy? Getting along OK, sweetie?

Rocco Dillon: As well as a heterosexual can in prison. I don't know how much longer I can take it. How's Tanya?

Muriel Dillon: Tanya's the same. Milky, creamy skin, pouting red lips, firm buttocks, ample breasts, ears you want to stick your tongue into.

Rocco Dillon: Ma, please. I'm gonna get guy cramps if you keep this up.

 

[bigboxes]

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Frank Drebin: Cheer up, Ed. This is not goodbye. It's just I won't ever see you again.

 

[bigboxes]

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Ed Hocken: You haven't shot anybody in six months.

Frank Drebin: That's true. Funny how you miss the little things.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Jane Spencer: Now I know why Ed's been calling every half hour. You've been back on a case, haven't you?

Frank Drebin: No, no, I swear, it's another woman.

Jane Spencer: In your wildest dreams.

 

[bigboxes]

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Dr. Stuart Eisendrath: You know, I feel it's important to get off on the right foot and not get caught up in blame. Now, which one of you is impotent?

Jane Spencer: Uh, that would be him.

Frank Drebin: Why don't you ask who's frigid?

Jane Spencer: Uh, that would be him also.

 

[WaTaGuMp]

Rocco Dillon: Any last words before I throw you off?

Jane Spencer: Yes. Don't do it.