RoboCop: [seeing Emil drawing his machine gun on him and draws his own gun] Drop it!
[Emil walks backwards]
RoboCop: Dead or alive, you're coming with me.
[Emil realizes who Robocop really is, for he had heard that statement earlier]
Emil: I know you! You're dead! We killed you!
[starts running and firing at Robocop]
Emil: We killed you!
[for demonstration, Mr. Kinney points a pistol at ED-209]
ED-209: [menacingly] Please put down your weapon. You have 20 seconds to comply.
Dick Jones: I think you better do as he says, Mr. Kinney.
[Mr. Kinney drops the pistol on the floor. ED-209 advances, growling]
ED-209: You now have 15 seconds to comply.
[Mr. Kinney turns to Dick Jones, who looks nervous]
ED-209: You are in direct violation of Penal Code 1.13, Section 9.
[entire room of people in full panic trying to stay out of the line of fire, especially Mr. Kinney]
ED-209: You have 5 seconds to comply.
Kinney: Help me!
ED-209: Four... three... two... one... I am now authorized to use physical force!
[ED-209 opens fire and shreds Mr. Kinney]
Dick Jones: [in a private bathroom] Promoted to executive, congratulations. I remember when I was a young executive for this company. I used to call the old man funny names. "Iron Butt." "Boner." Once I even called him..."asshole." But there was always respect. I always knew where the line was drawn. And you just stepped over it, buddy-boy. You've insulted me. And you've insulted this company with that bastard creation of yours. I had a guarantee military sale with ED 209. Renovation program. Spare parts for 25 years. Who cares if it worked or not?
Bob Morton: The old man thought it was pretty important, Dick.
Dick Jones: You know, he's a sweet old man. And he means well. But he's not gonna live forever. And I'm number two around here. Pretty simple math, huh, Bob?
Dick Jones: [about to walk out of the bathroom, then rubs Morton's hair] You just...
[Jones grabs Morton's hair]
Dick Jones: fucked with the wrong guy.
Bob Morton: [removes Jones' hand out of his hair] You're out of your fucking mind!
Dick Jones: You better pray that that unholy monster of yours doesn't screw up.
Clarence Boddicker: H-hey, now wait a second.
[Robocop takes aim as he advances on Clarence; Clarence chuckles nervously as he realizes that Robocop truly means to kill him]
Clarence Boddicker: Now wait a minute... you're taking this kind of personally, aren't you?
[fear becomes apparent in his voice as Robocop approaches]
Clarence Boddicker: Come on now, man, you're making me nervous. Come on, you can't do this! Don't mess around! Hey! Hey! Hey, man, now don't get cute!
Bob Morton: Yes! Now that's how you do it in the big leagues, Johnson. You see an opening, you *go* for it!
Johnson: You better watch your back, Bob.
Johnson: Jones is gonna come looking for you.
Bob Morton: Oh, fuck Jones. He fumbled the ball, I was there to pick it up.
Johnson: Too bad about Kinney, huh?
Bob Morton: That's life in the big city.
Johnson: [about Robocop project] When do we start?
Bob Morton: Soon as some poor schmuck volunteers.
[opening monologue] Ash: My name is Ash and I am a slave. Close as I can figure, the year is thirteen hundred A.D and I'm being dragged to my death. It wasn't always like this, I had a real life, once. A job. Ash: [now Ash is in a flashback] Umm... Hardware aisle twelve, shop smart, shop S-Mart! Ash: [back to monologue] I had a wonderful girlfriend Linda. Together we drove to a small cabin in the mountains. It seems an archeologist had come to this remote place to translate and study his latest find: Necronomicon ex mortis. The Book of the Dead. Bound in human flesh and inked in blood, this ancient Samarian text contained bizarre burial rights, funeral incantations, and demon resurrection passages, it was never meant for the world of the living. The book awoke something dark in the woods, something evil.
[something crashes through the window of the cabin and Linda screams] Ash: It took Linda. Then it came after me, it got into my hand and it went bad, so I lopped it off at the wrist.
[Ash is seen cutting off his hand] Ash: But that didn't stop it, it came back big time. Ash: [Ash gets pulled into the vortex holding onto the doorway] For God's sake how do you stop it?
[Ash falls into the vortex and the opening credits start]
[Ron Miller is holding City Hall hostage to get an old job back and Lt. Hedgecock is negotiating from outside with a bullhorn]
Lt Hedgecock: Okay Miller! Don't hurt the mayor! We'll give you what you want!
Miller: First, don't fuck with me. I'm a desperate man! And second, I want some fresh coffee. And third, I want a recount! And no matter how it turns out, I want my old job back!
Lt Hedgecock: Okay.
Miller: And I want a bigger office! And I want a new car! And I want the city to pay for it all!
Lt Hedgecock: What kind of car, Miller?
Miller: Something with reclining leather seats, that goes really fast, and gets really shitty gas mileage! Alright.
Lt Hedgecock: How about a 6000 SUX?
Miller: Yeah! Okay, sure! What about cruise control? Does it come with cruise control?
Lt Hedgecock: Hey, no problem, Miller. You let the mayor go, we'll even throw in a Blaupunkt!
Miller: Lieutenant, don't jerk me off! When people jerk me off, I kill them! You wanna see?
[Miller goes over to the Mayor]
Lt Hedgecock: Get up, Your Honor. Get up! Get up. Your public wants to see you.
[Miller pulls the Mayor to the window and points the gun at his head]
Miller: Nobody ever takes me seriously! We'll get serious now... and kiss the mayor's ass goodbye!
[Robocop punches through the wall, grabbing Miller and the gun, then he punches Miller in the face and sends him flying out the window]
Duke Henry: You Sir, are not one of my vassals... who are you? Ash: Who wants to know? Duke Henry: I am Henry the Red. Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands and leader of its peoples. Ash: Well hello Mister Fancypants. Well, I've got news for you pal, you ain't leadin' but two things, right now: Jack and shit... and Jack left town.