++ ATOT official NEF thread part IV ++

[eldorado99]

ned

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

Fffffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

 

[shortylickens]

Humped my best mate's wife last night and today i feel awful. She must have had the flu or something.
--
My mate always cries after sex. Mind you he is in prison.
--
A well-dressed lawyer went into a bar for a martini and found himself beside a scungy-looking drunk who kept mumbling and studying something in his hand. The attorney leaned closer while the drunk held the tiny object up to the light, slurring "Well, it looks like plastic". Then he rolled it between his fingers, adding "But it feels like rubber". Curious, the lawyer asked "What do you have there, mister?" The drunk stammered "Damn if I know, but it looks like plastic and feels like rubber". The lawyer said "Let me take a look". And the drunk handed it over. The attorney rolled it between his thumb and fingers, then examined it closely. "Yeah, it does look like plastic and feel like rubber, but I don't know what it is. Where did you get it anyway?" The drunk replied "Outta my nose".
--
A longhaired kid is hitchhiking and gets picked up by a trucker. After a few miles the hitchhiker asks "Well are you going ask if I'm a boy or a girl?" The trucker says "It doesn't matter. I'm going to fuck you anyway".
--
This penguin goes into a photo shop and asks for some shots for his passport. The assistant asks, "Would you like them in black and white or in colour". "I'll give you one fucking guess, dickhead" replies the penguin.
--
I bought one of those anti-bullying wrist bands today. Well I say 'bought'... I actually stole it from a fat, ginger kid.

 

[shortylickens]

A man walked out to the street and hailed a taxi just going by. He got into the taxi and the cabbie said "Perfect timing. You're just like Brian!" Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Brian Sullivan. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happen like that to Brian Sullivan, every single time". Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody".

Cabbie: "Not Brian Sullivan. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy!" Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special".

Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Brian Sullivan, he could do everything right". Passenger: "Wow. Some guy then".

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Brian, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Brian Sullivan".

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?" Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Brian. He died. I'm married to his widow..."

 

[eldorado99]

ned

 

[Barfo]

 

[Rinaun]

500th post

suck it

 

[zzuupp]

ned

 

[zzuupp]

ned

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

Realizing, I don't like work, as much as I highly dislike my boss.

 

[nageov3t]

not sure how to read a guy I've been talking to on okcupid looking up my profile on a hookup app.

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

Kind of excited.
Remainder of my Block Kuzushi GB gameplay going up today.
I initially started playing that for no reason than a test run. Quickly realized I had unlimited continues. Said, fuck it. Went through whole damn game.
It won't bring much of any traffic my way, but it is another (unintentionally) complete.

Also all the extra shit in Astro Boy: Omega Factor to unlock last stage is going up. Then will be working on getting that damn game done & onto whatever is next.

I really want to get Final Fantasy Tactics Advance finished. That would be cool. During 50hr weeks, last thing I have much patience for is figuring out WTF is going on.

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

not sure how to read a guy I've been talking to on okcupid looking up my profile on a hookup app.

I saw a really cute CD/trans on there. I worked up the courage to message them, but didn't get a response.

 

[nageov3t]

if someone is like, "hey, why don't I come over after work and we can cook dinner?" there's a certain presumption that they'll be bringing something to cook, right?

as opposed to walking into my kitchen and going, "so, what do you have?"

I almost never cook during the week I either make food over the weekend to eat throughout the week or just eat sandwiches... it's kind of a pain to go grocery shopping after work and I rarely have the energy to cook.

 

[zzuupp]

if someone is like, "hey, why don't I come over after work and we can cook dinner?" there's a certain presumption that they'll be bringing something to cook, right?

as opposed to walking into my kitchen and going, "so, what do you have?"

I almost never cook during the week I either make food over the weekend to eat throughout the week or just eat sandwiches... it's kind of a pain to go grocery shopping after work and I rarely have the energy to cook.

I'd read it exactly as that "something", but not everything.

presumably, the absolute bare minimum would be the main dish would be brought

 

[zzuupp]

alternative answer:

He'd bring the meat.

You be the desert. :whiste:


:biggrin:
:biggrin:

 

[nageov3t]

not sure how to read a guy I've been talking to on okcupid looking up my profile on a hookup app.

I decided to send him a joking message about being saddened by him not having any naked pictures on his profile (not that I do)

hard to get a read on this guy... he alternates between super flirty and semi-disinterested.

we tentatively have a first date scheduled next week (with the agreement that neither of us are really looking for anything serious), but I don't be too surprised if he ends up cancelling at the last minute.

at least it's a restaurant where I'd feel comfortable-ish eating alone with a book, worst case scenario.

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

I always get too awkward before I can even get anywhere near to inviting anyone out on a date on there.

 

[nageov3t]

I always get too awkward before I can even get anywhere near to inviting anyone out on a date on there.

seemed like a natural progression.

after a few days of exchanging messages back and forth, we exchanged numbers since it's easier to text... after a couple days texting, I was like "we should really hang out one of these days, what's your schedule like?"

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

Wonderful.

I left here last night under impression boss was calling this customer.
But he didn't.
Irate customer shows up this morning. Find out boss informed him of nothing when I left last night.
Customer wanted their stuff back, but boss has the customers HDD with him. Then customer gets mad at me about not being updated about it.
So I had to try best at keeping calm & hoping it blows over. Guy had his friend here, I think he noticed I wasn't too enthralled of the situation so he just diffused the situation & got them both out of here.
Fuck.

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

seemed like a natural progression.

after a few days of exchanging messages back and forth, we exchanged numbers since it's easier to text... after a couple days texting, I was like "we should really hang out one of these days, what's your schedule like?"

Yea. I don't even get far as exchanging numbers either... lol..

I had been speaking on/off with this one female for about a year. She lives too far away to make anything a regular. So after not speaking in 2-3 weeks I worked up courage and was just like fuck it.
Mentioned hey let's meet up in the city some time, some blah blah event is going on soon. All that thought & effort into my well worded invitation received a "maybe".
Doesn't sound interested, at all. I enjoyed our brief social exchanges over the past year.
I don't think either of us were really each others type either. She's mad tall & I'm hella short. Not that I mind her being tall. We did share a few common interests.
So, done with that dead end. Moving on... :'(

 

[nageov3t]

I'm following my "never initiate contact twice in a row" rule, but I think if I don't hear from him today, I'll message him tomorrow to be like, "if we're still on for lunch, does 2 pm work?"

 

[nageov3t]

Yea. I don't even get far as exchanging numbers either... lol..

I had been speaking on/off with this one female for about a year. She lives too far away to make anything a regular. So after not speaking in 2-3 weeks I worked up courage and was just like fuck it.
Mentioned hey let's meet up in the city some time, some blah blah event is going on soon. All that thought & effort into my well worded invitation received a "maybe".
Doesn't sound interested, at all. I enjoyed our brief social exchanges over the past year.
I don't think either of us were really each others type either. She's mad tall & I'm hella short. Not that I mind her being tall. We did share a few common interests.
So, done with that dead end. Moving on... :'(

waaaay too long.

if I'm messaging with someone and it's going well, I'll offer up my number after 5-6 days (otoh, if they take forever to respond or their messages are really short, I'll assume their disinterested... I also refer back to my, "I never initiate contact more than once (maybe twice) in a row" rule)

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

I was really hoping & looking forward to this shop relocating so I could spend this entire month doing nothing but being on the hunt for pussy.
I don't have a whole lot of free time to work on that with these bullshit 50hr weeks.

 

[SaDiZTiKStyLeZ]

waaaay too long.

if I'm messaging with someone and it's going well, I'll offer up my number after 5-6 days (otoh, if they take forever to respond or their messages are really short, I'll assume their disinterested... I also refer back to my, "I never initiate contact more than once (maybe twice) in a row" rule)

Most times when our conversations would end, we wouldn't speak for weeks or months.
One of our earlier conversations we briefly discussed possibly meeting up in the city for something should opportunity or anything arise.
It was an event we both shared a mutual interest in, so I figured what better opportunity? Hey fuck it, this is coming up, wanna meet up? I thought I pitched it amongst some of my best A-game lines.
I ended up not going to Blues Fest because I couldn't find anyone else who may share interest to accompany me...