anyone Remember when you were given "the talk"

[otispunkmeyer]

oh yes the talk about sex.....

i remember my dad used the term "a standing prick has no consience"

 

[nageov3t]

my dad started to give me "the talk" when it was just he and I in a car together on a 9 hour road trip to visit his family, but I was just like "no. if you continue down this line of conversation, I am going to jump out of this car into oncoming traffic on the highway" :laugh:

 

[Sheepathon]

Yeah, when I walked in on them in the middle of a particularly rough session and learned about how I was made...

...I was four

.....I still don't know how babies are made

...........HAHA JUST KIDDING

 

[ActuaryTm]

Originally posted by: Sheepathon
.....I still don't know how babies are made

"When she is ready to mate, the human female approaches a male's basement and wafts a sex "perfume" called a pheromone in his direction. He responds by fanning the air with his overtly hairy arms, permeating his apartment with her perfume.

He emerges from his basement with his neck outstretched aggressively. She responds with a brief boxing match or by feigning interest in a periodical regarding monster trucks. Either attitude seems to work to curb the male's aggression. The female lifts off her top and places it on his head to let him know she is ready to get busy. They enter the basement, and some time after, from a few hours to several days later, the female finally succumbs to the exhaustion of waiting. At this point the male could mate with her or turn his direction back toward any number of electronic-type devices, but he invariably does the noble thing. He gently turns her limp body over onto her back with his scrawny arms and braces-laden mouth, being careful not to tear her soft flesh. They mate "with a poignant gentleness that is almost lobster-like."

She stays in the safety of his basement for about a week until the male?s parental units demand they vacate. By then the attraction has passed, and the couple part with hardly a backward glance."

 

[JulesMaximus]

Originally posted by: Sheepathon
Yeah, when I walked in on them in the middle of a particularly rough session and learned about how I was made...

...I was four

.....I still don't know how babies are made

...........HAHA JUST KIDDING

Nice. :laugh:

 

[mjh]

I don't remember my dad ever giving me an official talk.

Originally posted by: Sheepathon
Yeah, when I walked in on them in the middle of a particularly rough session and learned about how I was made...

...I was four

.....I still don't know how babies are made

...........HAHA JUST KIDDING

haha

 

[her209]

I was never given "the talk". I had to learn it on the streets.

 

[Cattlegod]

Originally posted by: her209
I was never given "the talk". I had to learn it on the streets.

 

[eakers]

My mom started and then I was like "MOM we learned about this at school, leave me alone"

The only other time we talked about anything like that was when I was 15 and worried I didn't get my period yet and my mom was like "yeah, thats weird, if you don't get it by the time you're 16, you better go to the doctor." GEE THANKS MOM.

 

[Cooler]

this is one thing i like about public schools it saves you from giving the talk.

 

[chcarnage]

"The talk" is overrated. I was given "the book". Nothing better than a good FAQ

 

[ShadowBlade]

i never had one

 

[Cooler]

Originally posted by: chcarnage
"The talk" is overrated. I was given "the book". Nothing better than a good FAQ

was this book playboy?

 

[Mrvile]

Health class, 5th grade. I don't think my parents ever gave me the talk.

 

[kogase]

Originally posted by: Cattlegod

Originally posted by: her209
I was never given "the talk". I had to learn it on the streets.

I wouldn't say the "streets", but I learned before my dad or my school told me anything.

 

[Ryan]

Originally posted by: Mrvile
Health class, 5th grade. I don't think my parents ever gave me the talk.

 

[jadinolf]

Originally posted by: otispunkmeyer
oh yes the talk about sex.....

i remember my dad used the term "a standing prick has no consience"

Never had "the talk".

 

[Leper Messiah]

never got the talk, but I got the "If you're going to fsck, then use a condom" bit.

 

[EatSpam]

Originally posted by: otispunkmeyer
oh yes the talk about sex.....

i remember my dad used the term "a standing prick has no consience"

My parents were good Christians, so my brothers and I got no talk. Its rather amazing that none of us got a girl pregnant as teenagers.

 

[MikeyIs4Dcats]

never got it.

thank god.

 

"keep it in your pants kid."

 

[Muse]

Absolutely never got a talk. But I knew exactly what sex was all about before I ever really touched a living woman. Yes, my imagination was that good.

 

[stinkynathan]

never got the talk either.

We talked about it around grade 5 in class. they gave us a book. "Give this to your dad," said they, "He'll know what to do."

And I did. He immediately got extemely uncomfortable and said, "Any questions?"

"Nope!" was my reply. He left the room.

Man was I an idiot. I should have thrown that book away like everyone else did.

 

[xSauronx]

i never got it
my parents gave me a book
which i slipped back onto their shelf 3 days later when they were out

was written by some christian author, dont recall who though

 

[FleshLight]

Never got it. That's why I have my username and have become a sexual deviant.