Anyone here adopted? Care to share opinions?

Pohemi · Jan 20, 2005

I'm wondering:
If you were adopted, when did your parents break the news to you? Did they tell you anything about your biological parents or were you able to contact them? How did you feel or what did you think about your biological parents, and did you/do you blame them for giving you up?

BTW, I don't need to know who wasn't adopted. These questions were supposed to be aimed at people who were, or are close to someone who was. Thanks. :roll:

silverpig · Jan 20, 2005

I'm not, but I've been involved with two women who were. I'm pretty sure they both knew really early. One never bothered to meet her biological parents until her bio-mom was on her deathbed and called my ex g/f. She went and saw her and a few days later she died. Still talks to that part of her new family though.

Juno · Jan 20, 2005

<~~ Not adopted.

Pohemi · Jan 20, 2005

Originally posted by: jewno
<~~ Not adopted.

OK...so...

Bryophyte · Jan 20, 2005

Originally posted by: Pohemi420
I'm wondering:
If you were adopted, when did your parents break the news to you?

They always celebrated the anniversary of my adoption (still do now). They told me stories about it, just like people tell their kids stories about when they were born. Occasionally, my Dad would tell me that I was the prize he got in the bottom of a box of Wheaties.

Originally posted by: Pohemi420
Did they tell you anything about your biological parents or were you able to contact them?

My mom gave me a paper when I was in high school that had information my birth mother gave the adoption agency (no names, but family health history, information about personalities, education, etc.) About six years ago, I got a copy of my original birth certificate and have managed to track down both birth parents and the two biological half siblings I have. I've met my birth mother and two of her siblings, and have talked on the phone and emailed/IMed with the others. I haven't told any relatives besides my spouse and sister.

Originally posted by: Pohemi420
How did you feel or what did you think about your biological parents, and did you/do you blame them for giving you up?

I am greatly relieved that I was adopted. I shudder to think how I would have turned out if my birth mother or her sister had raised me (her sister wanted to adopt me, but she said no.) They're pretty messed up. I would've been ok if my birth father had raised me, but I'm glad everything turned out the way it did.

Edit: to clarify, I was given up for adoption at birth. I never considered anyone to be my "real" parents besides my mom and dad (the ones who raised me.) While I have gotten to know my birth relatives a bit, they do NOT feel like "family", more like friends.

jjones · Jan 20, 2005

Nope, I wasn't adopted.

miri · Jan 20, 2005

I found out when I was pretty young, but I came from a very poor country so it was obvious I did not look like my parents. Anyway I am pretty glad I was adopted because I probably would have died of starvation if not.

SacrosanctFiend · Jan 20, 2005

I was adopted by my step-uncle after my grandmother died. The first time I met him was about 2 months before he took me in.

JulesMaximus · Jan 20, 2005

My wife was adopted at birth. She doesn't know who her Bio-Mom is. Her parents are the people who raised her and she doesn't have any interest in finding her Bio-Mom.

I think she's known since a fairly young age. Don't know how that made her feel though. It doesn't seem to be an issue though. Her parents love her the same.

Pohemi · Jan 20, 2005

I understand that if you're adopted (by people of no blood relation to you) you'll most likely always think of your adoptive parents as your real parents. Even though you may not be their child by blood, they raised you and loved you just as much (I hope). I just want to know how people who were adopted feel about their biological parents, and if they care whether or not they ever met them.

BTW, I don't need to know who wasn't adopted. These questions were supposed to be aimed at people who were, or are close to someone who was. Thanks. :roll:

Bryophyte · Jan 20, 2005

Pohemi420: clarified my answer a bit in my post above.

Pohemi · Jan 20, 2005

Originally posted by: Bryophyte

Edit: to clarify, I was given up for adoption at birth. I never considered anyone to be my "real" parents besides my mom and dad (the ones who raised me.) While I have gotten to know my birth relatives a bit, they do NOT feel like "family", more like friends.

Well said...

Pohemi · Jan 21, 2005

Anyone else?

Sluggo · Jan 21, 2005

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
My wife was adopted at birth. She doesn't know who her Bio-Mom is. Her parents are the people who raised her and she doesn't have any interest in finding her Bio-Mom.

I think she's known since a fairly young age. Don't know how that made her feel though. It doesn't seem to be an issue though. Her parents love her the same.

Same situation at my house, or else my wife is living a double life........dun, dun, dun.

IAteYourMother · Jan 21, 2005

After readingn the OP, im inclined to say
<---------- NOT ADOPTED

Pohemi · Jan 21, 2005

Originally posted by: Pohemi420
BTW, I don't need to know who wasn't adopted. These questions were supposed to be aimed at people who were, or are close to someone who was. Thanks. :roll:

Originally posted by: IAteYourMother
After readingn the OP, im inclined to say
<---------- NOT ADOPTED

Yeah...thanks douchebag. Don't you have anything better to do?

:|

His Lord Uberdude · Jan 21, 2005

I have three friends who were adopted. I think they knew from the start (even though they were like one) because they had been in foster care or something.

Pohemi · Jan 21, 2005

Have they ever talked about this to you? Do you know if they ever think about it?

DougK62 · Jan 21, 2005

My mom was adopted. The couple that raised her told her everything they knew about her birth parents. She's never tried to contact them.

AmigaMan · Jan 21, 2005

I'm not adopted, but my wife and I are considering adopting a child in a year or two. Actually had a conversation about it last night. It's probably gonna be expensive, but I think it will be worth it. Just don't know where to start...

ragazzo · Jan 21, 2005

not adopted, but if i were, i wouldn't care about contacting my birth parents. my parents are the ones who raised me well.

captains · Jan 21, 2005

box of wheaties...........ahahhahahahhahahahaha

Pohemi · Jan 21, 2005

So if you were adopted and you never bothered trying to contact your blood relation, why? Does it have anything to do with being angry or feeling betrayed? Or do you just not care enough either way to bother?

Pohemi · Jan 21, 2005

Originally posted by: AmigaMan
I'm not adopted, but my wife and I are considering adopting a child in a year or two. Actually had a conversation about it last night. It's probably gonna be expensive, but I think it will be worth it. Just don't know where to start...

Start with an adoption agency. Just make sure you don't get pressured into anything you're not comfortable with. And best of luck to you. :thumbsup:

ragazzo · Jan 21, 2005

Originally posted by: AmigaMan
I'm not adopted, but my wife and I are considering adopting a child in a year or two. Actually had a conversation about it last night. It's probably gonna be expensive, but I think it will be worth it. Just don't know where to start...

you can adopt me. i could use a new car, dad!

j/k good luck

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