Mermaidman
Diamond Member
- Sep 4, 2003
- 7,987
- 93
- 91
Freshman yr: I took physics course for dumbasses (aka--Non science major physics). The prof was this oddball--around 60 yrs old, wore a suit usually, but had long hair and beard. After our first exam, he ripped the entire class, using curse words such as 'fukc.'
Maybe you guys don't have your facts straight, so I'll lay the out for you:
Facts:
1. Teacher are mammals.
2. Teachers fight with kids ALL the time.
3. The purpose of a teacher is to flip out and kill people (verbally or otherwise).
Yeah, he just really couldn't stand people sleeping in his class. His class was so entertaining that he rarely had a problem with it. I'm pretty sure nobody has ever slept in his class as often as I did. I think he was just so used to being entertaining he couldn't handle it.Originally posted by: dquan97
ouch...I guess you made an impact with the guy
Oh well, like I said, he was awesome. We asked him about his beard, and he threw together an equation of how much of your life you waste shaving. He said (and I know this to be true) that when they originally offered him the job, they told him he'd have to shave his beard (Catholic high school). He told them no, but he had great credentials, grades, and they just couldn't turn him away (especially since they don't pay anything and anyone willing to put themselves through that HAS to be dedicated). Heck, he had already written a book and had it published. I know for a fact that since then they've hired teachers that they made shave their beards.
That guy's awesome.
This reminds me of the scene from School of Rock
'Your kids have touched me, and im pretty sure I have touched all of them.'
Jesus christ, are you two internet inept? He'd did a play on Real Ultimate Power. I don't know a single person who hasn't seen that website at least once.
One time I was in a class and we have wings with windows on the outside. A kid that was supposedly "absent" from the class walked by the windows and my teachers flipped his lid. He got this look on his face like he crapped his pants and he screamed "I'M GONNA GET YOU!!!" and then he booked it out of the room, it was really wierd :x
Then one time my science teacher got some phone call and he started breathing really loud like he was pissed. Then some kid told him to chill out and the teacher was like "Atleast my wife didn't divorce you!!!" and then he started laughing really loud and ran to his back room, slammed the door and didn't come out except to take roll for the rest of the day.
- Kevin
Then one time my science teacher got some phone call and he started breathing really loud like he was pissed. Then some kid told him to chill out and the teacher was like "Atleast my wife didn't divorce you!!!" and then he started laughing really loud and ran to his back room, slammed the door and didn't come out except to take roll for the rest of the day.
- Kevin
OK, ok, just calm down. Everything's cool. Why do I get the feeling that I wouldn't be safe if I kept questioning you?
Anyway, I thought of another good story to tell:
We had a statistics teacher that was old as dirt. I don't know how old he was, but he looked like the kind of guy that would be 60 but had worn himself out enough to be more physically and mentally the equivalent of a 90-year-old. He donated the land to our college that they used to build the new library on, so no matter how worthless he was, the school kept him around. He walked with a bit of a hump in his back, frequently wore a sombrero-like hat on sunny days and would tell everyone he passed how wonderful a day it was. He was as bad as the counselor from South Park with his CONSTANT "Mmmkay? Mmmkay? Mmmkay!" and "Right? Right?". He not only said those things, but he could stand in for those guys any day on the voice and you'd never know the difference. He talks EXACTLY like that. Same pitch and everything. And VERY slow. It was maddening. He would ask us a question about the material and say, "This is what? What? What? What? 6, right? Right? Right? Mmmkay." Nobody EVER answered because, again, he was asking us answers to questions the he hadn't taught us how to solve yet! He drank vodka every day in class, except for the few occasions in which he had coffee, in which case we're pretty sure he spiked it.
I had him for a night class, once a week, both times I was in his class. I dropped him in Stat I because I couldn't even do the homework because he didn't teach anything in class. My strong suit has always been math, and I aced Stat I when I didn't have him. Then when it came time to take Stat II, I figured that I had it down enough that I could teach myself the stuff, and he had a GREAT time slot, so I took his Stat II class. I lasted two weeks. Then I aced it when I took it with another instructor.
So, as for stories about him, there are many. He frequently would start teaching the previous week's stuff all over again or jump ahead a week. It was not easy convincing him to move to teh right week, but when he did, he'd get that old person smile on his face that said, "Oh! You're right, that's so silly of me, hee hee hee."
Ok, ok, something better. He'd start talking about something, and then in mid-sentence would just zone out. He'd stare at the board and not say a word. In the 5 weeks (3 weeks in Stat I, 2 weeks in Stat II) I had him for class, I actually saw him do this TWICE! IN FIVE WEEKS!! When he came back to, he'd kind of shake a bit and look back through his notes to find where he was. Obviously, he rarely got back to the right place in the lecture.
On more than one occasion (though I never witnessed this, my roommate was in a class this happened in), he would start talking exceptionally slow and then pass out at his desk. When it happened to my roommate, everyone in class went totally silent. They looked around at each other for awhile, but due to his already weird behavior didn't know what to do. He was obviously still breathing, so they knew he was alright, but they waited for a few minutes not sure what to do. Finally, they started leaving class. He said he was one of the last to leave because he wanted to see if he'd wake up or not. Nope. Nothing. Could you imagine waking up in a dark room a while later and your whole class is gone? He said that he didn't mention it at their next class, he just went on to the next day's lecture.
Then there was his minor flip out. This guy was like a burnout (I said "like" because I don't know anything for sure), so he really didn't seem energetic enough to blurt anything out. It was a few days after the school year, and my roommate (same guy from before) walks by him on campus. He had never spoken to him outside of class whatsoever. "Hey, how's it going?" he says to my rommate. "Did you hear I quit? Yup, just quit. F*ck 'em!"
Originally posted by: tkotitan2
Was just reminiscing of my college days (i graduated last year) and was remembering all the great stories of the professor who just lost it in front of the class. I figure this could be entertaining so let's share
The best one I was witness to was actually my fault. Every MWF, we had circuits class. One wed, we cover how RMS power worked. In a different class, every thursday, we met to go over future labs for EE lab, different teacher. So on thursday, all the students are also taking the previous class as well, and the professor asks us if we know what RMS power is, and he gets a sea of dumbfounded faces. I actually heard him, and chose not to speak up in lecture, but he is pakistani with an accent, and when he asked us he was kinda facing the board so many may not have heard him. Later that thursday afternoon, I am in my lab, and one of the professors helping me likes to pick on the other professor who teaches the circuits class, and says something like "so, what's professor xxx teaching you now?" I mention we are learning RMS power, and the lab instructor overhears me and is like "so why didn't anyone say anything in today's prep class?" I told him i just thought people were being shy or something. Later I am walking the building and I see all of the above mentioned professors standing in the hall talking to each other, and the guy who teaches the circuits class looks pissed. So, naturally in fridays circuits class, the professor is like "you told your lab teacher you don't know what RMS power is! (walks around the steps in the dead silence and quietly but firmly says) you embarass me. You embarass me." All the while i sit in the front row and try not to burst out laughing since i was the catalysts of it all.
But a better one that happened in a friend's class is when one day, the professor devoted an entire lecture to going over circuit bias, as a review to make sure everyone knows it. At the end, he asks some kids in the class if they can determine if a circuit is forward or reverse bias. These i guess were the not-so-bright kids in the class he asked. The first kid got it wrong and the teacher was like "Ahhh! You so stupid! Get out! Go kill yourself" The student, shocked, gets out and leaves. He similarly tests the second kid, who also gives him the wrong answer and the professor is like "Ahhh! You get out and go kill yourself too. No, you go kill each other!" I can't remember if the guy was japanese or chinese, one of the two.
Guess you have to be an engineer to appreciate these...
Q: I heard that teachers are always cruel or mean. What's their problem?
A: Whoever told you that is a total liar. Just like other mammals, teachers can be mean OR totally awesome.
Q: What do teachers do when they're not handing out tests or flipping out?
A: Most of their free time is spent flying, but sometime they st@b. (Ask Mark if you don't believe me.)
That wouldn't be the dumbest thing I've heard someone on here say that meant it. It is a shame that I didn't get the quote, but at least it caused me to go back to Real Ultimate Power's website. That place is awesome. I haven't been there in years.Originally posted by: MrDudeMan
bahahahahahahaha ilmater and jemcan are nominated for tool of the week!
idiotshow could you not tell he wasnt serious? lol that was awesome staley and ouloat
arcenite
Lifer
- Dec 9, 2001
- 10,660
- 7
- 81
My favorite involves a substitute for my study hall senior year of high school....
The teacher passes out the attendance and everyone puts their name on, and then some... You know, names like Mike Hunt. Yes, the teacher called out every single name and we were laughing our asses off.
The teacher passes out the attendance and everyone puts their name on, and then some... You know, names like Mike Hunt. Yes, the teacher called out every single name and we were laughing our asses off.
Originally posted by: Ilmater
That wouldn't be the dumbest thing I've heard someone on here say that meant it. It is a shame that I didn't get the quote, but at least it caused me to go back to Real Ultimate Power's website. That place is awesome. I haven't been there in years.Originally posted by: MrDudeMan
bahahahahahahaha ilmater and jemcan are nominated for tool of the week!
idiotshow could you not tell he wasnt serious? lol that was awesome staley and ouloat
Ya, it's a great site. I was just messing with ya earlier
Good stories though.TRENDING THREADS
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