I think that the "play as spectator" option is severely under-rated. Clinth, I was reeeeally bad at UT when a friend gave it to me as a Christmas gift a year ago. Eventually I found a nice server which repeated only my favorite DM map ("Elmo's Deck 16][ server"😉, on which I lurked as a spectator for a while (it is listed as "expert only"😉, and practiced a lot with bots at high difficulties (slowly increasing as I got better) Once I felt comfortable, I joined, and eventually I was even able to win once on that server.
I can't say that I know of any newbie servers, though.
Gosh, this makes me want to play UT again... (this year the same friend gave me Q3, and I am going through a similar process, hehe). Anyway, practice, play as spectator, take-up the offer for tutoring, and you'll get good enough to avoid getting nuked instantly and be able enjoy UT like so many of us do.
Have fun with it! 🙂