Thanks for those who had rational, emotion-free responses.
It seems shallow to judge someone as a snob based on the square feet of their house. And... As I stated in my second post, I grew up in a 900SF home with 5 people. My Dad comes from a line of farmers and coal miners... He broke the mold with an engineering degree. I grew up as low/middle class American - an "average Joe" who came from a happy family. I never wished I lived in a larger home while I was growing up, and I was always content. My wife spent 5 years of her childhood in a trailer home. Money can't buy happiness; that's a given in our lives. And yes, we feel fortunate to live in the US.
I've worked very hard to improve on the little my parents could give me. My BSME is 100% financed. I have a great job that I like and get paid well to do it. My wife has a BSCS that she/I paid for 100%.
I was not as educated as I should have been at the time I purchased the home I talked about in my OP. I moved up from an 1800SF house a few miles down the road with the intent to have a place to "live" as much as an investment... I have 5 kids now so the extra space is a really nice thing to have. Is it necessary? No. But do we enjoy the home? Absolutely. We may have more kids. I love kids. I'm guessing at least some of the kneejerk "snob" comments were from people that have more SF/person than myself.
Anyway... Like most other folks, my property value has taken a hit since I built due to the recession. There's nothing I can do about that.
But... The HOA code deficiency seems like something that could be addressed, and I'd like to do so if possible. For those that don't understand the importance of having homes of similar value adjacent to your own in a subdivision, you may want to educate yourself more.
I'm have mixed feelings about HOAs. I chose to live in a "protected" neighborhhood to avoid people who don't care about anyone but themselves -- people with little civic pride. These people can be found in any neighborhood. Neighborhoods in the US with smaller homes typically have a higher percentage of folks like this, but a small home does not a slob make. Again, I grew up in a 900SF home. I like the idea of an HOA helping someone understand "good stewardship"... But like most other people, I want them to stay out of my business on trivial things that don't affect property value.
I've seen letters of concern about things like how long the garbage cans should be out in the street for pickup etc... That's fine, but I wish the HOA had been more proactive in telling me that the few empty lots around my place were going to be sold to a builder that is taking advantage in some covenant loopholes.
Yes, I and almost all the other 13 homeowners on my street did not look through every nook and cranny of the HOA covenants prior to purchase. It was implicitly understood that similar quality/value homes would be built in any remaining lots similar to what had been done since we moved in almost 5 years ago before the last 15-20 houses had been sold...
It was a surprise to learn the covenants did not match the homes in my phase of the subdivision. It's as if there's no relationship to the specs of the "established" homes at all. I'm beyond flogging myself for my inattention to the Elephant in the Room.
I'm hoping to get the covenants changed ASAP to prevent a builder from non-compliance to the obvious "established standard". I'm not sure why someone would think it's wrong to want to preserve their property value...
At this point, I have the backing of 13 other "dumb homeowners"... Since I've never been part of an HOA and the rules vary from place to place, I'm not sure how much (if any) help from a lawyer is required (or if there is any hope for that matter)...
I'll be at the next HOA committee meeting 7Feb to table the issue... I'm not sure what to expect... Probably a lost cause but maybe not...