My wife and I have a 7 month old with another baby on the way in June. So far being a parent rocks but the lack of sleep is killing us, our little boy hates to go to sleep. So every night we usually wake up 3-4 times to get up with the baby and try to coax him back to sleep. Is there any way to get babies to sleep better and longer at night? How do you get babies to not fight going sleep?
Any ATOT parents out there?
- Thread starter Arkitech
- Start date
This book will save your sanity:
http://www.amazon.com/Solve-Your-Childs-Sleep-Problems/dp/0743201639
it's basically a method of getting the baby to go back to sleep on its own. It works.
http://www.amazon.com/Solve-Your-Childs-Sleep-Problems/dp/0743201639
it's basically a method of getting the baby to go back to sleep on its own. It works.
from a reader's comments:
"Sears claims that by not responding to a crying baby at night, you teach your baby that mommy is unresponsive. That the baby who doesn't cry at night has "given up." And that attachment can suffer as a result. (He even states that "Ferberized" children do continue to cry out frequently at night, but that their desensitized parents do not hear them.) Ferber claims that you can teach your baby that you are still "there," but that your brief visits are not worth all the crying. Ultimately the baby learns to go back to sleep readily on his or her own."
I am not a parent, but I must say the idea of abandoning a baby to the dark of night and ignoring it's cries seems terribly disturbing.
GTaudiophile
Lifer
- Oct 24, 2000
- 29,767
- 33
- 81
funboy6942
Lifer
- Nov 13, 2001
- 15,368
- 418
- 126
No meaning to brag but I was blessed with the best son any parent could of asked for. My boy would wake up in the middle of the night for a midnight snack and go right back to sleep. He always slept through the whole night since childbirth. Never, and I mean never went through the terrible 2. Growing up we would tell him that wasn't for him or the baby and he would actually leave it alone. He has been the total opposite of what my parent has tried warn me about, me having a child just like I was for them 
All I can say is we kept him on a schedual, same time feeding, bed times, naps, and bundling him up like a burrito seemed to work wonders wrapping him up really tight in a blanket. For some reason when his wrap got lose he would fuss. I would re-wrap him up and he go back out like a light, nurse said some babies like that for it reminds them of the womb, it worked for him, maybe give it a shot with yours? OH she mentioned also that they make a audio device that mimics a human heart, can try that too with the wrap.
Edit
Waggy, Swaddling, thats the name she said it was, yeah, he loved it. Always slept good when we did that, hed get lose, swaddle him back up and he was good to go.
All I can say is we kept him on a schedual, same time feeding, bed times, naps, and bundling him up like a burrito seemed to work wonders wrapping him up really tight in a blanket. For some reason when his wrap got lose he would fuss. I would re-wrap him up and he go back out like a light, nurse said some babies like that for it reminds them of the womb, it worked for him, maybe give it a shot with yours? OH she mentioned also that they make a audio device that mimics a human heart, can try that too with the wrap.
Edit
Waggy, Swaddling, thats the name she said it was, yeah, he loved it. Always slept good when we did that, hed get lose, swaddle him back up and he was good to go.
GTaudiophile
Lifer
- Oct 24, 2000
- 29,767
- 33
- 81
Another suggestion: Beethoven or some other, soft classical music. Put them to sleep and culture them at the same time!
<--- Not a parent!
<--- Not a parent!
waggy
No Lifer
- Dec 14, 2000
- 68,143
- 10
- 81
yeah thats a pain.
we took a parenting class for the 1st child. we were told is devolop a schedual. keep that schedual.
so we moved the kid into the there bedroom at 4 months. at 8pm its his bed time (usually asleep by then or at least hungry) so if awake i feed him and put him in teh crib. If he wakes up (depending on how long he has been asleep) i give him another bottle and change him. then put him back in the crib. usually he falls back asleep. but every now and then he will start to cry. i let him cry for a few minutes then go in and check if he wants more of his bottle (if any left) and check his diaper. then put him back in the crib and let him cry it out. usually takes 10 minutes and he is asleep.
now he is sleeping through the night. from 8pm-8am.
funboy: swaddling! yeah my daughter loved that.
we took a parenting class for the 1st child. we were told is devolop a schedual. keep that schedual.
so we moved the kid into the there bedroom at 4 months. at 8pm its his bed time (usually asleep by then or at least hungry) so if awake i feed him and put him in teh crib. If he wakes up (depending on how long he has been asleep) i give him another bottle and change him. then put him back in the crib. usually he falls back asleep. but every now and then he will start to cry. i let him cry for a few minutes then go in and check if he wants more of his bottle (if any left) and check his diaper. then put him back in the crib and let him cry it out. usually takes 10 minutes and he is asleep.
now he is sleeping through the night. from 8pm-8am.
funboy: swaddling! yeah my daughter loved that.
It's not as bad as that, the method actually works in just a few days. And trust me, no parent is 'desensitized' enough not to hear the baby crying.
You let the baby cry for very short times, but the key is, to go in, comfort them, then get out quickly. Otherwise they never learn to go back to sleep themselves.
Plus, OP needs to move the crib out of their bedroom.
JulesMaximus
No Lifer
- Jul 3, 2003
- 74,586
- 986
- 126
My son was sleeping pretty much through the night at 3 months. We moved him into his own room shortly thereafter and he's always slept in his own room since then.
I'd suggest some white noise in the room. Maybe a small fan or air purifier.
I'd suggest some white noise in the room. Maybe a small fan or air purifier.
haha I was thinking of crushing up some of those sleeping pills and stir it up in his bottle.
Benadryl also works too..
j/k OP I wouldn't do that to a baby (toddler maybe
)You should put the child in a different room if possible. Put together a sleep schedule and stick to it.
All kids are different and what worked well with one, doesn't necessarily mean it will work with another. My wife and I were lucky in that our son starting sleeping through the night at 6 weeks. We put him to bed at 7 and then my wife wakes him up at 10 to breastfeed. He goes back to sleep and then doesn't wake up until sometime between 7 & 9. He's been on that schedule for the past 7 months.
shortylickens
No Lifer
- Jul 15, 2003
- 80,287
- 17,082
- 136
One thing that is VERY important, consistency. When my daughter was born, my mom stayed with me a good month. She taught me, pretty much the same time every night, or close to that, Get the child ready for bed the same time every night. Start with a bath. You call the shots, not the child, getting a child ready for bed, should not take hours and hours. So many parents feel guilty for not spending enough time with their child, over indulging only does more damage. Kids need boundaries, limits. Do yourself and him a favor, stick to a schedule.
A bath relaxes the child, eventually you should put the child in his/her own room. You will be creating dependency if you allow the child to stay in your room. Don't do that. They need to learn to fall asleep in their own bed, their own room. Creates a healthy happy normal child.
Trying to get him to sleep, go in, reassure him, but only for a short amount of time, you can't stay and cuddle and cuddle. Go in after 20 minutes, then 30. Its almost rewarding his behavior, by allowing him to do whatever he wants. You will have to hear him cry, eventually he will fall asleep.
You must stop this behavior before the new one arrives. Again, consistency is key. Be firm, loving, reassure, then put him back down, he won't like it, too bad, he needs to learn this is bed time, and to go to sleep. You can do it. Good luck, keep us posted.
A bath relaxes the child, eventually you should put the child in his/her own room. You will be creating dependency if you allow the child to stay in your room. Don't do that. They need to learn to fall asleep in their own bed, their own room. Creates a healthy happy normal child.
Trying to get him to sleep, go in, reassure him, but only for a short amount of time, you can't stay and cuddle and cuddle. Go in after 20 minutes, then 30. Its almost rewarding his behavior, by allowing him to do whatever he wants. You will have to hear him cry, eventually he will fall asleep.
You must stop this behavior before the new one arrives. Again, consistency is key. Be firm, loving, reassure, then put him back down, he won't like it, too bad, he needs to learn this is bed time, and to go to sleep. You can do it.
Good luck, keep us posted.I don't know how you guys feel about letting you baby cry it out, but we had to do that with 2 or our 3 kids. Never let them cry very long, but start with letting them cry about 5 minutes, go in and comfort them but don't pick them up, then let leave. Repeat as needed. As they get a few weeks older, let it go to 10 minutes. In all honesty, it's never taken more than a week and a half for us. I know some people think it's cruel, but it's always worked for us. This obviously only works if the baby is not in the room with you though.
That's my advice. Take it for what it's worth.
That's my advice. Take it for what it's worth.
Newborns, thats fine, but, the longer you wait, the worse it will be. They will become dependent on your presence, and need you always there to help fall asleep. And besides, that will cramp time with you and your spouse.
I seriously would not do that for too long. Sooner the child realizes they have a bedroom, and it's not a punishment to go to bed, the happier the child will be in his/her own room.
They need to realize, they have a room of their own to sleep in.
For your own sanity
We put our son into his own room at around 6 weeks. I'll tell you, we were more nervous about it than him! He slept right through the night.We did it primarily because we didn't want him getting used to sleeping with us in the room. His bedtime routine starts promptly at 7:00 PM and there have been times that he would cry after putting him down. We just let him cry it out as it almost always never lasts for more than 15 minutes. I can only remember one time we went back in because he was fussing for so long - turns out he pooped himself after we put him down and I guess he didn't want to sleep with a load in his pants
My wife and I have 11 month old twins that have slept through the night since they were 4 months old. They have NEVER spent the night in our room once they didn't have to eat during the night, and are never rocked to sleep. We read if you rock them to sleep, they become dependent on it. We decided it best to let them figure out how to sleep on thier own, which they did without a problem. We had the unfair advantage(if you could call it that) of them spending the first 3 weeks of their premature life in the intensive care unit, so they were used to lots of noise while they slept. Due to ear pressures they didn't hear real good til a month ago either, which also helped quite a bit.
The first 4 months was really rough, since they had to eat every 3 hours, but after that the nights became pretty easy. Could just be luck though
The first 4 months was really rough, since they had to eat every 3 hours, but after that the nights became pretty easy. Could just be luck though
By 7 months old, some babies have started crawling-- I wouldn't consider that to be very young. Most babies are sleeping through the night at this point-- the reason that OP's baby's not is probably because it's in the same bedroom as its parents, and they get up with it when it cries.
It's good advice. I'm not a parent, but my parents take in foster children, so I've been around babies from newborn to 2 years old all of my life. Parents who rock their babies to sleep every night are asking for trouble-- babies need to learn how to settle themselves. You can still make an appearance when they're crying, just to let them know they're not alone, but don't pick them up to rock them to sleep.
Usually when my mom gets a child who's over 6 months or so who doesn't sleep through the night yet, it only takes a few nights of doing this for them to figure out that the best thing for them to do is just go to sleep.
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