- Nov 19, 2001
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The following post was originally posted by WombatWoman on Monday, April 08, 2002. I have posted it here for those who have never read her posts.
The sun is rising on a typical day in Offtopicana, a suburb of the busy metropolis AnandTown. Mayor Russ is chain-smoking (using real chains!) while preparing for his impeachment hearing, after having been accused of understanding Moonbeam.
Red Dawn is spending a leisurely hour at the spa, enjoying an esteem bath while having his fangs sharpened and his vitriol tank refilled, unaware that his arch-enemy Texmaster is plotting to destroy him by boring him to death.
In the afternoon, sexy shenanigans reach a crescendo (what is that 'fapping' sound???) as Perknose, happykitten, baffled2, hzl_eyed_grl, and the late Thunderbooty engage in a public flirting exhibition, only to be upstaged by the last-minute entry of Jerboy, whose arrival causes the audience to stampede for the exits, injuring many, including Jerboy himself. He will be OK as soon as his swollen ego goes down (unlikely.)
Gossip abounds regarding eakers' new baby. Rumors say that the child may have been fathered by everybody. However, the pink-haired, nekkid infant bears a distinct resemblance to Adul (who, in a startling revelation, may not be a woman after all.) There is shocking news that Paulson and Hubbs were switched at birth; the always diplomatic and wise Harvey suggests that the situation can be remedied by cutting them in half, then reassembling the pieces and changing their usernames to Haulson and Pubbs.
The AnandTech Moderators decide to crack down on posts that promote copyright violation, drug use, sexual themes, and personal attacks, and the subsequent drastic downsizing of the forums results in massive moderatorial layoffs. The one remaining Mod is required to be The Fun Mod, The Mean Mod, and The Watchful Mod all at once. The stress causes him to fall into modness, and the poor fellow is carted off to the modhouse, shrieking "Ban 'em into the Stone Age!"
The sun is setting now in Offtopicana, and the cool evening is punctuated by intermittent cries of "pics!" Occasionally you can hear a nonexistent Fusetalk Forum bug droning amid the steady buzz of nefs nattering about religion, LOTR, cars, politics, Bruce Lee vs Coke, and butter. As we settle in for the night, we hear the comforting sound of threads being locked, to keep the trolls out. All is well in AnandTown, where the deals are hot, the dudes are cool, and the women are above average (all eight of them.) Good night. Sleep tight. Don't let the Best Buy bite.
More of her posts can be found here.
The sun is rising on a typical day in Offtopicana, a suburb of the busy metropolis AnandTown. Mayor Russ is chain-smoking (using real chains!) while preparing for his impeachment hearing, after having been accused of understanding Moonbeam.
Red Dawn is spending a leisurely hour at the spa, enjoying an esteem bath while having his fangs sharpened and his vitriol tank refilled, unaware that his arch-enemy Texmaster is plotting to destroy him by boring him to death.
In the afternoon, sexy shenanigans reach a crescendo (what is that 'fapping' sound???) as Perknose, happykitten, baffled2, hzl_eyed_grl, and the late Thunderbooty engage in a public flirting exhibition, only to be upstaged by the last-minute entry of Jerboy, whose arrival causes the audience to stampede for the exits, injuring many, including Jerboy himself. He will be OK as soon as his swollen ego goes down (unlikely.)
Gossip abounds regarding eakers' new baby. Rumors say that the child may have been fathered by everybody. However, the pink-haired, nekkid infant bears a distinct resemblance to Adul (who, in a startling revelation, may not be a woman after all.) There is shocking news that Paulson and Hubbs were switched at birth; the always diplomatic and wise Harvey suggests that the situation can be remedied by cutting them in half, then reassembling the pieces and changing their usernames to Haulson and Pubbs.
The AnandTech Moderators decide to crack down on posts that promote copyright violation, drug use, sexual themes, and personal attacks, and the subsequent drastic downsizing of the forums results in massive moderatorial layoffs. The one remaining Mod is required to be The Fun Mod, The Mean Mod, and The Watchful Mod all at once. The stress causes him to fall into modness, and the poor fellow is carted off to the modhouse, shrieking "Ban 'em into the Stone Age!"
The sun is setting now in Offtopicana, and the cool evening is punctuated by intermittent cries of "pics!" Occasionally you can hear a nonexistent Fusetalk Forum bug droning amid the steady buzz of nefs nattering about religion, LOTR, cars, politics, Bruce Lee vs Coke, and butter. As we settle in for the night, we hear the comforting sound of threads being locked, to keep the trolls out. All is well in AnandTown, where the deals are hot, the dudes are cool, and the women are above average (all eight of them.) Good night. Sleep tight. Don't let the Best Buy bite.
More of her posts can be found here.
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