Am I over-reacting?

[BD2003]

Yes, youre over-reacting.

 

[StageLeft]

No your situation is not wrong. I can't say whether you're over-reacting or not but I think it's their problem, not yours. THEY should get over it.

 

[iamwiz82]

<< Umm, since im about about ur age, umm.. screw them ... they are old fashion
but they are thinking about u for ur own good, wat if im ur boyfriend, and i played you,
you never know .. man are dog.. this is true, cuz im a dog myself, and every guy i know is dog too
They just want you to be on your best interest ...

let me guess.. u must be asian .. maybe chinese i suppose ? >>



nope, we are both white. I'm 100% polish, she is a mix of polish and slovak

 

[weezergirl]

Hey be lucky you are not me. I have a boyfriend and my parents don't even know he exists!

It's a given that some parents are going to be old-fashioned. you either have to accept it or choose to ignore their feelings. Just wondering but why do you feel the need to live with him so early? If you guys end up getting married you'll have the rest of your life to live with him. And I agree that you should always live with someone before you get married but you're still so young. unless u are planning to get married like next year or something. heh.

anyways, I don't think it's that big of a deal to not live with your bf to keep your family happy. At least you can date him!!!! And in case you haven't seen, most people DON't approve of this arrangement and it is embarassing to them. If you don't care, then dont' worry about it, if you do, then maybe you should reevaluate your situation and wait on living with him. (what's the big deal?)

 

[iamwiz82]

<< Hey be lucky you are not me. I have a boyfriend and my parents don't even know he exists!

It's a given that some parents are going to be old-fashioned. you either have to accept it or choose to ignore their feelings. Just wondering but why do you feel the need to live with him so early? If you guys end up getting married you'll have the rest of your life to live with him. And I agree that you should always live with someone before you get married but you're still so young. unless u are planning to get married like next year or something. heh.

anyways, I don't think it's that big of a deal to not live with your bf to keep your family happy. At least you can date him!!!! And in case you haven't seen, most people DON't approve of this arrangement and it is embarassing to them. If you don't care, then dont' worry about it, if you do, then maybe you should reevaluate your situation and wait on living with him. (what's the big deal?)

>>


she cares about the situation because she doesnt want to lie to her family.

We moved in together because we both need a place to live for college. This was the best idea.

 

[Cyberian]

Try to remember that your Grandma and her sisters are from a totally different era.
Their ideas and morals are not the same as yours. You have every right to live your life as you see fit, just try a little to understand their concern for you.

 

[TurtleMan]

Umm damn, i did not know white poeple would be so oppose for thier kid to move out ...
i thought kid just took off after they are 18..

But , like you said, a place for college to live, im all for it.
Im married, and im 21 only. but my wife doesn't live with me
she still live with her parent, she still come to sleep with me like 3 or 4 times during weekday
and the whole weekend , and i found that work pretty good ..

I think that's pretty of u guys, but how u gonna supoort urself ?
I just wonder..

 

[exp]

My late night ramblings:


<< Am I over-reacting? >>

Yes, you overreacted. Losing your temper is never a good idea under any circumstances and it certainly will not convince your elders of your maturity. Think about it, if you can't handle a simple conversation without spazzing out then how can they reasonably expect you to successfully navigate the many trials that come with cohabitation?


<< Is my situation really that wrong? >>

Personally I don't think so but everyone has a right to their own opinions and no single position on this topic is definitively "right"--not yours, not mine, *nobody's*. If you feel that you are mature and responsible enough to handle this arrangement then as I see it your best option is to go ahead and prove it through action, *not* by blustering like some spoiled child (no older person is going to be intimidated by that). Tell your aunt very calmly--incidently this will probably infuriate her more than screaming ever could--the following:

--that you respect and value her opinion and that is why you lost your temper
--that you are sorry she feels that way, but you feel confident that one day she will see things from your perspective and come to accept you as part of the family
--that you know she is only looking out for you best interests, but that after all is said and done you have an obligation to yourself to do what *you* think is right

From then on conduct yourself as an adult in every way (at least when your aunt is around ). Hopefully she will realize that you are mature enough to handle your own affairs...otherwise it's her problem, not yours.

Also, while I wish you guys the best don't rule out the possibility that (*gasp*) your aunt may actually be right...I know, you are 19 and think you know everything but trust me, old folks aren't as stupid as you think. If the relationship doesn't work out there's no shame in admitting you were wrong.

 

[chickendinner]

In one word, yes.