Am I a dick for not wanting to hang out with someone who had Gastric bypass?

[sandorski]

More Stupid than Dickish, unless you said it to her face. For all you know she could be exactly what you want in a mate, but can't see it cause you are stuck on this detail. Chances are that's not true, but you may never know.

 

[MrColin]

Its pretty safe to assume that most ATOT posters are lard-asses, those guys will readily affirm that you are a dick from under their pile of Twinkie wrappers and soda bottles.

There are multitudes of women that will refuse to hang out with you because they don't like your shoes.

Dick not found. You would be doing the former Ms. Walrus a disservice by hanging out with her if her faults bother you already. Don't be compelled to spend time with people just to not be a dick, it wont work.

 

[HamburgerBoy]

There are multitudes of women that will refuse to hang out with you because they don't like your shoes.

I do not understand the implications of this statement. Draw a circle, and label it "Non-fatties". Draw another circle, and label it "Women that will hang out with me despite my shoes". Now, take the two circles and overlap them until you have found the total number of women on Earth that are not obese and are content with your tattered kicks. Do you see the problem yet?

 

[Rage187]

Not sure if anyone has said it yet but yes you are a dick.

Agreed.

It's like not wanting to hang out with someone that had a tumor removed. "You mean your immune system is so weak it couldn't attack the cancer?"

 

[dmcowen674]

Am I a dick for not wanting to hang out with someone who had Gastric bypass?

I was with a girl the other day, and having a decent time, then she mentions she lost 130 lbs. My ears perk up because I assume she's interested in health/fitness, which is something I enjoy. Nope. Gastric Bypass. Am I an asshole for thinking that shit is insane? You're basically saying "Doc, I have no ability to control myself, so I need you to GUT ME, hack my stomach into pieces, REROUTE my mangled intestines, and then sew that shit back up". The operation can be done to to treat morbid obesity, hypertension, diabetes, etc....except all of these conditions can be treated by....losing fucking weight naturally.

The fucked up thing is, you have to lose weight before you get the surgery usually, to show the doctors you're serious....JUST KEEP DOING WHAT YOU DID TO LOSE THE FUCKING WEIGHT. Alright, I'm done ranting, but fuck. How fucking lazy/fucked up do you have to be that "putting the fucking fork down" is a less appealing option than having your guts scrambled?

Yes, you are a dick and a whole lot more.

 

[z1ggy]

Yup you're a dick.. But that doesn't most other guys wouldn't do the same. I would hang out with a chick if she lost 130lb, regardless of the way she did it because odds are she looks like Stewie after he lost his 'roid muscles when she takes her clothing off. *shutter*

 

[OILFIELDTRASH]

You can hang with whoever you want to. The judgemental stuff is not healthy though. I'm trying not to be judgemental myself. We all have problems. And the ones that act like they don't usually have the most.

 

[PricklyPete]

Not "hang out"... That's pretty rough, but I would totally understand that being something that would hold up dating. It indicates a high lack of self control and not something I want in a mate.

 

[Old Hippie]

Am I a dick for not wanting to hang out with someone who had Gastric bypass?

A major dick.

 

[Vdubchaos]

I was with a girl the other day, and having a decent time, then she mentions she lost 130 lbs. My ears perk up because I assume she's interested in health/fitness, which is something I enjoy. Nope. Gastric Bypass. Am I an asshole for thinking that shit is insane? You're basically saying "Doc, I have no ability to control myself, so I need you to GUT ME, hack my stomach into pieces, REROUTE my mangled intestines, and then sew that shit back up". The operation can be done to to treat morbid obesity, hypertension, diabetes, etc....except all of these conditions can be treated by....losing fucking weight naturally.

The fucked up thing is, you have to lose weight before you get the surgery usually, to show the doctors you're serious....JUST KEEP DOING WHAT YOU DID TO LOSE THE FUCKING WEIGHT. Alright, I'm done ranting, but fuck. How fucking lazy/fucked up do you have to be that "putting the fucking fork down" is a less appealing option than having your guts scrambled?

I don't think you are a dick and I would do the same thing. I wouldn't tell the person, but wouldn't call her again.....big red flag.

Remember, doctor don't have an incentive when a client does well for themselves and takes steps to improve their life.. Surgery makes money....so it's hard to blame them.

However I wouldn't date a person that would go that route....that's just pathetic.

 

[Pacfanweb]

Agreed.

It's like not wanting to hang out with someone that had a tumor removed. "You mean your immune system is so weak it couldn't attack the cancer?"

Wrong. You don't have a choice whether to get a tumor or not. Someone has a choice whether to eat too much or not.

 

[nehalem256]

Agreed.

It's like not wanting to hang out with someone that had a tumor removed. "You mean your immune system is so weak it couldn't attack the cancer?"

Horrible analogy.

Now maybe if you could have your cancer cured by dropping the Cheetos and Mountain Dew you would have a point.

 

[Fritzo]

Its pretty safe to assume that most ATOT posters are lard-asses, those guys will readily affirm that you are a dick from under their pile of Twinkie wrappers and soda bottles.

There are multitudes of women that will refuse to hang out with you because they don't like your shoes.

Dick not found. You would be doing the former Ms. Walrus a disservice by hanging out with her if her faults bother you already. Don't be compelled to spend time with people just to not be a dick, it wont work.

I don't know about mos ATOTers being lard asses. We talk quite a bit about fitness here. I'm rather buff myself.

 

[rach3l]

Wrong. You don't have a choice whether to get a tumor or not. Someone has a choice whether to eat too much or not.

Being fat is not like cancer, that analogy is stupid. But there are a number of reasons a lot of people are obese that aren't within their conscious control. Many people are raised on fast food, were never taught proper nutrition or exercise habits, and increasingly work long hours at jobs that are largely sedentary. A modern adult woman can be working full time while taking care of both her children and her adult parents, and it's a better investment of her time to pick up a bucket of KFC on the way home than to cook a healthy meal for 6+ people.

There are also mental illnesses that are correlated with obesity due to the self-soothing nature of eating--victims of childhood sexual abuse are overwhelmingly likely to be obese.

Nobody has to date anybody they don't like, for any reason. So I wouldn't judge a person who didn't want to date an ex-fattie. But in this context, refusing to consider being friends with someone who used to be fat is, indeed, extraordinarily dickish.

 

[PingviN]

Its pretty safe to assume that most ATOT posters are lard-asses, those guys will readily affirm that you are a dick from under their pile of Twinkie wrappers and soda bottles.

There are multitudes of women that will refuse to hang out with you because they don't like your shoes.

Dick not found. You would be doing the former Ms. Walrus a disservice by hanging out with her if her faults bother you already. Don't be compelled to spend time with people just to not be a dick, it wont work.

In good shape here, still thinks OP is being a dick about it.

 

[Jodell88]

I don't know about mos ATOTers being lard asses. We talk quite a bit about fitness here. I'm rather buff myself.

Shhh. He's just projecting himself on to other people. :sneaky:

 

[nehalem256]

Being fat is not like cancer, that analogy is stupid. But there are a number of reasons a lot of people are obese that aren't within their conscious control. Many people are raised on fast food, were never taught proper nutrition or exercise habits, and increasingly work long hours at jobs that are largely sedentary. A modern adult woman can be working full time while taking care of both her children and her adult parents, and it's a better investment of her time to pick up a bucket of KFC on the way home than to cook a healthy meal for 6+ people.

But yet they have time to undergo major surgery?

There are also mental illnesses that are correlated with obesity due to the self-soothing nature of eating--victims of childhood sexual abuse are overwhelmingly likely to be obese.

Nobody has to date anybody they don't like, for any reason. So I wouldn't judge a person who didn't want to date an ex-fattie. But in this context, refusing to consider being friends with someone who used to be fat is, indeed, extraordinarily dickish.

Seems like someone you might want to avoid.

 

[Pacfanweb]

Being fat is not like cancer, that analogy is stupid. But there are a number of reasons a lot of people are obese that aren't within their conscious control. Many people are raised on fast food, were never taught proper nutrition or exercise habits, and increasingly work long hours at jobs that are largely sedentary. A modern adult woman can be working full time while taking care of both her children and her adult parents, and it's a better investment of her time to pick up a bucket of KFC on the way home than to cook a healthy meal for 6+ people.

Horse shit. EVERYONE is taught about the food groups and nutrition in freaking elementary school, middle school and even high school. They are taught exercise. EVERYONE is. They always have been. Difference is, now they just choose to stuff their fat faces and sit on their fat asses and not do the right thing. It's all about personal accountability, there is no excuse.


It's on TV everywhere, how to eat right, lose weight, not gain weight, get in/stay in shape.

You can live on fast food and not eat too much of it. You can eat whatever you want, as long as your proportions are controlled.

People simply CHOOSE to eat more now. The obesity problem is new, within the last 20 years. Go back and look at photos/yearbooks just from the mid-80's, and most kids/people were not fat like now.

There are more options for eating, no doubt.....that doesn't mean that people should exercise those options.

 

[Pacfanweb]

I don't know about mos ATOTers being lard asses. We talk quite a bit about fitness here. I'm rather buff myself.

I'm not buff, could stand to lose a few lbs, but I'm not a massive lard ass, either.....but I don't put the responsibility for whatever my weight is on anyone but myself.
In fact, I did just that earlier this year, and simply started eating smaller portions after shoulder surgery. Lost over 10 lbs with NO exercise. (couldn't do any) Now just had knee surgery, (main reason I couldn't do cardio) and my weigh-in prior to surgery was less than it was 4 years ago.

Have done not a damn thing but not eating quite as much. Less-or-no fries with a burger. Smaller drinks. Stuff like that. Still eating mostly the exact same things, just not as much.

That's why I don't believe anyone who says they "tried a diet and it didn't work". For 99.9% of people who say that, it's a lie. ALL diets work...IF you follow them.

So anyone who claims to have tried multiple diets and "they just didn't work for me", that's code for "I just couldn't make myself eat less".


Now, you take someone who is a morbidly obese hog: Think about it this way...NFL linemen have to eat a shitload of calories to stay 330 lbs. That's because of two reasons: One, they are burning them off. Two, very few people, even ones with NFL-size frames, are NATURALLY that damn big. You have to FEED that size, or it'll disappear.

Same thing for a fattie: You would not be that big if you weren't feeding it. So you don't need to actually eat less than a normal person to lose weight.....just eat NORMAL, and do a little exercise, and the weight will start melting off.
People think they can't diet because they just can't eat those small meals....you don't have to. Just eat what USED to be considered "normal". Don't super-size it. That's all it takes.

 

[Fritzo]

Shhh. He's just projecting himself on to other people. :sneaky:

Ah.

 

[Fritzo]

I'm not buff, could stand to lose a few lbs, but I'm not a massive lard ass, either.....but I don't put the responsibility for whatever my weight is on anyone but myself.
In fact, I did just that earlier this year, and simply started eating smaller portions after shoulder surgery. Lost over 10 lbs with NO exercise. (couldn't do any) Now just had knee surgery, (main reason I couldn't do cardio) and my weigh-in prior to surgery was less than it was 4 years ago.

Have done not a damn thing but not eating quite as much. Less-or-no fries with a burger. Smaller drinks. Stuff like that. Still eating mostly the exact same things, just not as much.

That's why I don't believe anyone who says they "tried a diet and it didn't work". For 99.9% of people who say that, it's a lie. ALL diets work...IF you follow them.

So anyone who claims to have tried multiple diets and "they just didn't work for me", that's code for "I just couldn't make myself eat less".


Now, you take someone who is a morbidly obese hog: Think about it this way...NFL linemen have to eat a shitload of calories to stay 330 lbs. That's because of two reasons: One, they are burning them off. Two, very few people, even ones with NFL-size frames, are NATURALLY that damn big. You have to FEED that size, or it'll disappear.

Same thing for a fattie: You would not be that big if you weren't feeding it. So you don't need to actually eat less than a normal person to lose weight.....just eat NORMAL, and do a little exercise, and the weight will start melting off.
People think they can't diet because they just can't eat those small meals....you don't have to. Just eat what USED to be considered "normal". Don't super-size it. That's all it takes.

This is a sensitive subject for me because of my wife's health issues. She was severely injured nearly a decade ago (spine). Since then she's had nerve damage that makes it painful to move for long periods. As a result, she had weight gain, which in turn caused swelling in her damaged areas and put her in more pain. She's in a catch 22- she can't move much to exercise, but all the pain meds she's on slow her metabolism down so much she would have to live on 800 calories a day to lose weight. She's on so many meds right now that I joke she could pour milk on them and eat them as cereal in the morning.

Her doctor is currently getting her set up for gastric sleeve surgery (insurance is paying for it) to help her take some weight off. We're hoping this helps break the cycle and gets her healthy again. The process for that took 2 years, and we're finally coming to the end.

Anyway, it's dangerous to judge people. Assuming someone is fat because they stuff themselves with pizza rolls all day may or may not be accurate.

 

[Vdubchaos]

This is a sensitive subject for me because of my wife's health issues. She was severely injured nearly a decade ago (spine). Since then she's had nerve damage that makes it painful to move for long periods. As a result, she had weight gain, which in turn caused swelling in her damaged areas and put her in more pain. She's in a catch 22- she can't move much to exercise, but all the pain meds she's on slow her metabolism down so much she would have to live on 800 calories a day to lose weight. She's on so many meds right now that I joke she could pour milk on them and eat them as cereal in the morning.

Her doctor is currently getting her set up for gastric sleeve surgery (insurance is paying for it) to help her take some weight off. We're hoping this helps break the cycle and gets her healthy again. The process for that took 2 years, and we're finally coming to the end.

Anyway, it's dangerous to judge people. Assuming someone is fat because they stuff themselves with pizza rolls all day may or may not be accurate.

Sorry to year. My wife is on a similar boat but not quite as bad.

Regardless, in the case above is where this type of surgery is ok for. There is ALWAYS an exception to the rule.

But for MOST people that get this surgery it's safe to assume that it's for ALL the wrong reasons.

 

[Atomic Playboy]

Horse shit. EVERYONE is taught about the food groups and nutrition in freaking elementary school, middle school and even high school. They are taught exercise. EVERYONE is. They always have been. Difference is, now they just choose to stuff their fat faces and sit on their fat asses and not do the right thing. It's all about personal accountability, there is no excuse.

It's on TV everywhere, how to eat right, lose weight, not gain weight, get in/stay in shape.

You can live on fast food and not eat too much of it. You can eat whatever you want, as long as your proportions are controlled.

People simply CHOOSE to eat more now. The obesity problem is new, within the last 20 years. Go back and look at photos/yearbooks just from the mid-80's, and most kids/people were not fat like now.

There are more options for eating, no doubt.....that doesn't mean that people should exercise those options.

What about people who have no choice? You're mentioning yearbooks; what child has the option to not eat what his family is serving? If there's a family who is buying KFC and pizza every night for dinner, what child is going to say "Nope, not for me, my teacher told me about a food pyramid?" And if his parents aren't willing to change their diets to accommodate proper nutrition, how can the child expect to get it? He doesn't have money, he doesn't have a car, he doesn't have the power to change his situation even if he wanted to do the right thing. We absolutely have an obesity problem in this country, and a lot of it starts very young, but that's because of bad parenting. If you're a 300 pound teenager and a doctor tells you to lose weight or die, a lot of blame lies with the parents for doing a horrible job monitoring the nutrition and exercise of their children.

 

[rach3l]

Horse shit. EVERYONE is taught about the food groups and nutrition in freaking elementary school, middle school and even high school. They are taught exercise. EVERYONE is. They always have been. Difference is, now they just choose to stuff their fat faces and sit on their fat asses and not do the right thing. It's all about personal accountability, there is no excuse.


It's on TV everywhere, how to eat right, lose weight, not gain weight, get in/stay in shape.

You can live on fast food and not eat too much of it. You can eat whatever you want, as long as your proportions are controlled.

People simply CHOOSE to eat more now. The obesity problem is new, within the last 20 years. Go back and look at photos/yearbooks just from the mid-80's, and most kids/people were not fat like now.

There are more options for eating, no doubt.....that doesn't mean that people should exercise those options.

The truth is, learning and habits begin and end at home. It doesn't matter what's taught in school if a kid goes home and their parents feed them junk and let them sit around indoors all day.

How can you claim with any validity that every kid in the whole country had the same education you did? That's ridiculous, you need to leave your bubble once in awhile. What about kids who are homeschooled? What about inner city kids who don't get education in these topics because their teachers are more concerned with getting them through standardized testing and preventing violence inside the classroom? What about kids who drop out of school? Nutrition education is not required for every American, it's just not possible to require educating literally everyone on any topic. So of course it's going to be missed by some (particularly in lower socioeconomic classes). Even in cases where nutrition education does exist, it's often barely touched on in PE or mentioned briefly in a one-quarter health class. Unless you were in a really good, well-funded school district--and not everyone has that luxury.

The only people who think weight is all about accountability and willpower have never struggled with weight in their entire lives. They may have been a little chunky sometime, but lost the weight without real hardship (I'm talking about you). It was easy for you, no question. But the amount of effort and willpower and hunger it takes some fat people to lose 10 pounds may be the same as the effort it takes a thin person to lose 30. Lots of people have decided it's not worth it. Not to mention, there are problems with ghrelin (the hungriness hormone) balance and satiety levels for fat people that someone who has never struggled with their weight has never experienced and can never understand (at least not without research, which you clearly haven't done).

You may find it easy to lose weight, because cutting down your food intake was relatively easy for you. Some people who try to cut down in their diet become rapaciously hungry 24 hours a day. And it never goes away. Would you deal with that for the rest of your life? Because statistics show that not many people can deal with it for more than a couple weeks. Most fat people that lose weight will gain it back within 5 years. All because their parents and teachers failed to instill proper nutritional and exercise habits when they were young.

So yeah, I think judging someone for having shitty stupid parents is a pretty dickish thing to do.

 

[blackdogdeek]

I guess I'm being naive by asking this but can't people change?