I use water.. I mean really small amount just to mist the actual sand paper. A spray bottle works.. very fine mist.. one spray and done. It also helps in keeping the sandpaper clean.. when it's wet it wipes clean really well from the stuff left on it from the lapping. I've also used the same alcohol I used for cleaning -- that also works just that it evaporates so fast on the paper and feels like it's not damp at all. Don't worry you wont get water on the good side of the CPU... even if you do for some insane reason... as long as it's dry and clean when you place it back in the mobo... you are golden.
If you dont have the black protective thingy that came with your CPU... you can take some cardboard, cut it about the same size of the CPU and tape it on (carefully around the edges and fold up so obviusly the tape is not on the back of the CPU which you are trying to sand). You need to have something to hang on to when you are lapping it... when i first did it after 10 minutes I had sanded my finger tips real nice... stupid me. Then again I was pushing down way too much but anyhow, it's way easier to lap the Heatsink than it is the CPU... just for the fact it's harder to hang on to that sucker properly.
I had a Scythe RevB and removed the stupid push pins and bought the same bolt through kit you mention. All i did was take a pair of scissors and cut the white push pins close to the heads and it was a simple of matter of snip snip and off they came. The kit works WONDERS!!
However, to this day, and I have tried about 6 types of coolers, there is nothing better than a TRUE... for how easy it is to mount, dismount, mount, dismout. I can mount that in like 30 seconds as the screws are not obstructed at all by the fins.. there is so much room for my hands to work it. When Lapping, I had to remove the freaking thing 10 times before I got the job right. Not sure how easy the Vendetta is.