22 Things to do next time on the elevator

puqdew

Banned
Jun 22, 2009
192
0
0

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask ?Got enough air in there??

2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you?re embarrassed when they open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: ?You?re one of THEM? - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY ?I wonder what all these do?? And push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: ?I have new socks on.?

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: ?Is that your beeper??

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: ?This is my personal space.?

14) WHEN there?s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn?t you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you?re waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say ?Hi Greg, How?s your day been??

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: ?That?s mine!?

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you?re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don?t exist.

22) CALL out ?Group hug? then enforce it.
 

Jeff7

Lifer
Jan 4, 2001
41,596
20
81
Surprise buttsex is not on the list?

It's such a great way to get to know strangers, inside and out.


 

theflyingpig

Banned
Mar 9, 2008
5,616
18
0
I'm seeing question marks in place of quotes. Is this normal, or is it merely a result of browsing this site on a superior Macbook?
 

Away

Diamond Member
May 1, 2005
4,430
1
71
Originally posted by: theflyingpig
I'm seeing question marks in place of quotes. Is this normal, or is it merely a result of browsing this site on an inferior piece of crap?

Fixed that for you.
 

Fritzo

Lifer
Jan 3, 2001
41,920
2,161
126
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

This would be better:

2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall with getting off.
 

Arcadio

Diamond Member
Jun 5, 2007
5,637
24
81
I like to make random comments while on an elevator. Especially when there are other people in the elevator with me.
 

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
Originally posted by: Arcadio
I like to make random comments while on an elevator. Especially when there are other people in the elevator with me.

I like to point out when people use the word random incorrectly. And I highly doubt that you verbalize anything obtuse in public settings. Maybe in your head, but certainly not out loud.
 

Arcadio

Diamond Member
Jun 5, 2007
5,637
24
81
Originally posted by: TallBill
Originally posted by: Arcadio
I like to make random comments while on an elevator. Especially when there are other people in the elevator with me.

I like to point out when people use the word random incorrectly. And I highly doubt that you verbalize anything obtuse in public settings. Maybe in your head, but certainly not out loud.

What's wrong with this use of the word 'random'? I choose a comment at random from my library of possible comments.

If I'm wrong, then what's the right word in this context?
 

Fritzo

Lifer
Jan 3, 2001
41,920
2,161
126
Originally posted by: Arcadio
I like to make random comments while on an elevator. Especially when there are other people in the elevator with me.

You like to make random comments everywhere. It's a problem, not something you just do on an elevator.
 

polarbear6

Golden Member
Jul 14, 2008
1,161
1
0
Originally posted by: puqdew

5) MEOW occasionally.

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY ?I wonder what all these do?? And push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: ?I have new socks on.?

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: ?This is my personal space.?

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: ?That?s mine!?

:laugh:

Old is gold.

Whats with the question marks ??
 

Jeeebus

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2006
9,181
901
126
I like to stand quietly, facing the door, and not look like a 10 yr old retard. But I guess that's just me.
 

illusion88

Lifer
Oct 2, 2001
13,164
3
81
Originally posted by: polarbear6
Originally posted by: puqdew

5) MEOW occasionally.

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY ?I wonder what all these do?? And push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: ?I have new socks on.?

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: ?This is my personal space.?

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: ?That?s mine!?

:laugh:

Old is gold.

Whats with the question marks ??

Copy paste straight from a poorly formatted email. At one point in the email chain someone couldn't read the special characters so their computer substituted the ?.