update: nothing.
The fix mentioned above is for a different issue, not the lack of DVI input on boot.
I waited on hold forever with BFG, their techies really know their stuff, i've dealt with them more than I'd like to remember.
He said that the Dell monitors have this problem with lots of cards, not just theirs. It's an issue with the monitor not accepting a relatively standard output in the console mode. It'll come up fine once you get to the windows drivers, but the output from the card isn't being interpreted correctly by the monitor.
There is, literally, nothing we can do about it.
SUXORS.
I'm going to try to trade this card for a better one, see if it fixes the problem.