1337 History

[UglyCasanova]

lol

 

[MercenaryForHire]

That's Short Bus Special.

- M4H

 

[Encryptic]

Originally posted by: MercenaryForHire
That's Short Bus Special.

- M4H

 

[Bootprint]

Valley Girl talk meets the AOLers...

 

[ElFenix]

you owe me a mt dew!

 

[Mr N8]

LOL! That is hilarious.

 

[MrHappyMonkey]

lmao

 

[Ladies Man]

my head hurts reading that

 

[Kenny]

After reading the CS one and getting a couple laughs I gave up.

 

[lowfatbaconboy]

to much "DUDE"
makes my head hurt

 

[Encryptic]

Originally posted by: lowfatbaconboy
to much "DUDE"
makes my head hurt

Dude, you're getting a Dell!

Dude, where's my car?

 

[conjur]

Sad thing is...that's probably going to be reality in a couple of generations.

:Q

 

[Atlantean]

haha that is funny.

 

[Rallispec]

ENGLAND CAME OVER TO TEH NEW WORLD, AND WUZ ALL LIKE, "DUDE XPANSION!" SO THEY BUILT A TOWN HALL, AND A BUNCHA PEASANTS, AND WUZ LIKE, "DUDE SWEET!" BUT THEN THEY WERE LIEK "OMG I RAN OUT OF GOLD." SO THEY SENT THEIR PEASANTS TO THE GOLD MINE.

THE PEASANTS WERE ALL LIEK "DUDE I WANNA STAY HOME AN EAT CHIPS." BUT ENGLAND WUZ LIKE "I NEEDS TEH FUNDS!" SO THE PEASANTS GOT PO'D.

THEY BUILT A BARRACKS, AND THEN MADE A BUNCH OF RIFLEMEN. THEY WERE ALL LIEK, "DIE ENGLAND." ENGLAND BOUGHT A BUNCH OF ZEPPLINS, AND SEND THEIR TROOPS TO TEH EXPANSION. THEY HAD KNIGHTS AND FOOTMEN AND RIFELMEN AND EVGEN PRIESTS! TEH XPANSION WUZ SCREWED.

BUT THEN A PALADIN, NAMED THOMAS JEFFERSON GOT WITHA N ARCHMAGE NAMED BEN FRANKLIN, AND THEY GOT THE MOUNTAIN KING NAMED GEORGE WASHINGTON TRAINED. THEY WERE ALL LIEK, "DUDE WE RN'T AN XPANSION," AND MADE THEIR OWN TOWN HALL. THEY WERE LIKE, "DUDE WERE FREE." JEFFERSON WUZ LIKE, "I GOT DIBS ON NAME!" AND SO HE NAMED IT AMERICA.

AMERICA FOUGHT TEH BRITISH, BUT WUZN'T DOING WELL. HOWEVER, THEY MSGed FRANCE AND WUZ LIKE, "DUDE WANNA BE MY ALLY?" FRANCE WAS LIKE, "K." AND SO FRACNE SENT OVER THEIR FOOTMEN AND STUFF, AND AMERICA BEAT BACK ENGLAND. GEORGE WASHINGTON REACHED LEVEL 6 AND USED AVATAR, AND BEAT UP A BUNCH OF RIFELMEN.

ENGLAND WUZ LIKE, "U CHEAT, FAGGORTS," AND LEFT THE GAME. AMERICA SENT A MSG TO BRITAIN. IT SAID, "OMG THX GG NO RE NOOB" SO AMERICA WON, AND BECAME A REAL COUNTRY.

HAHAHAHAHA

 

[Cyberian]

Originally posted by: conjur
Sad thing is...that's probably going to be reality in a couple of generations.

:Q

I don't think it's even going to take that long, but some of those stories were hilarious!!

:beer:

 

[zsouthboy]

This is great.

 

[UglyCasanova]

PREZ ROOSEVELT GO DOWN TO COSTA RICA. HE WAS LIKE, "DUDE i WANT A CANAL? I GIVE YOU 10 MILLION BUCKS AND 250 MILLION CHIXXORS EACH YEAR, K?"

COSTA RICA WAS ALL LIKE "DUDE U RN'T GIVIGN ENOUGH MONEY. GIVE US 25 MILLION BUCKS, THE CHIXXORS ARE SWEET."

SO, ROOSEVELT WAS ALL LIKE, "STFU, NOOB." HE WENT DOWN TO WHAT IS NOW PANAMA, AND WAS ALL LIKE, "U KNOW? COSTA RICA SUXXORS. U WANNA GO ATTACK THEM, AND I'LL HELP YOU?"

PANAMA SAID, "KTHX," AND ROOSEVELT PARKED HIS GUNSHIPS OUTSIDE COSTA RICA. HE WAS ALL LIKE, "DIE, NOOB," AND COSTA RICA WAS ALL LIKE "OMG NO!" AND THEN THEY GAVE UP AND WAS ALL LIKE, "OKAY, PANAMA, I GIVE JOO LAND."

AND SO ROOSEVELTS LIKE, "DUDE, PANAMA. I WANT CANAL, JES??? DUDE I GIVE YOU 10 MILLION BUCKS, AND 250 MILLION CHIXXORS EACH YEAR."

PANAMA WAS ALL LIKE, "DUDE SWEET," AND TOOK THE MONEY AND CHIXXORS.

ROOSEVELT WENT DOWN TO PANAMA, AND BUILT A CANAL, AND WAS ALL LIKE, "DUDE I ROCK!"

THE END.

That one's my favorite.

 

[Dragon365]

Originally posted by: UglyCassanova

PREZ ROOSEVELT GO DOWN TO COSTA RICA. HE WAS LIKE, "DUDE i WANT A CANAL? I GIVE YOU 10 MILLION BUCKS AND 250 MILLION CHIXXORS EACH YEAR, K?"

COSTA RICA WAS ALL LIKE "DUDE U RN'T GIVIGN ENOUGH MONEY. GIVE US 25 MILLION BUCKS, THE CHIXXORS ARE SWEET."

SO, ROOSEVELT WAS ALL LIKE, "STFU, NOOB." HE WENT DOWN TO WHAT IS NOW PANAMA, AND WAS ALL LIKE, "U KNOW? COSTA RICA SUXXORS. U WANNA GO ATTACK THEM, AND I'LL HELP YOU?"

PANAMA SAID, "KTHX," AND ROOSEVELT PARKED HIS GUNSHIPS OUTSIDE COSTA RICA. HE WAS ALL LIKE, "DIE, NOOB," AND COSTA RICA WAS ALL LIKE "OMG NO!" AND THEN THEY GAVE UP AND WAS ALL LIKE, "OKAY, PANAMA, I GIVE JOO LAND."

AND SO ROOSEVELTS LIKE, "DUDE, PANAMA. I WANT CANAL, JES??? DUDE I GIVE YOU 10 MILLION BUCKS, AND 250 MILLION CHIXXORS EACH YEAR."

PANAMA WAS ALL LIKE, "DUDE SWEET," AND TOOK THE MONEY AND CHIXXORS.

ROOSEVELT WENT DOWN TO PANAMA, AND BUILT A CANAL, AND WAS ALL LIKE, "DUDE I ROCK!"

THE END.

That one's my favorite.

Same here, that was great.

 

[GeekDrew]

IN THE BEGINNING IT WAS ALL IN RANDOM CODE AND THERE WAS NO EXECUTABLES. SO THE LEAD PROGRAMMER "GOD" WAS MIGHTY MIFFED AND WAS ALL LIKE "THIS SUXXORS" AND WROTE A COMPILER. AND ALL WAS COMPILED AND GOD WAS HAPPY. BUT THERE WERE STILL NO EXECUTABLES. SO GOD WAS LIKE "OMM( OH MY ME)" AND SEPARATED THE CODE INTO FUNCTIONS. AND THERE WAS FUNCTION CALLED EARTH AND WATER AND STARS AND ALL SORTS OF STUFF IN MILLIONS AND MILLIONS LINES OF CODE, BUT IT WAS ALL GOOD CAUSE GOD WAS UBER LEET ADMIN AND THERE WAS NO DEVILSOFT TO FUXXOR IT ALL. AND GOD SAW ALL THAT AND WAS LIKE "I RULE". BUT THERE WERE STILL NO EXECUTABLES. SO GOD RUN BORLAND AND HAD IT BUILD THE COMPILED CODE AND THAT CREATED EXECUTABLES AND GOD INTEGRATED A WHOLE BUNCH OF ANIMATED JPEGS AND WROTE THEM AI AND PATHFINDING AND IT WAS ALL GOOD. THERE WERE EXECUTABLES BUT SOMETHING WAS STILL MISSING. AND THE GOD WENT "I AM BORED I NEED GAMES" SO HE WROTE A GAME AND CALLED IT "HUMANS" AND HE LIKED THE GAME SO MUCH THAT HE BUILT A AWESOME NEW PROCESSOR JUST FOR IT AND CALLED IT "EDEN". AND ALL WAS WELL AND GOD WAS HAPPY SO HE LET THE AI TAKE OVER, AND THAN JUST SAT BACK AND GRABED A B33R AND SAID "ALL SHALL REST LIKE THIS"

TEH BEGINNING

ONE DAY, PHAROH WUZ EATING CHEETOS AND WATCHING TV, AND WAS LAUGHING AT THE SLAVES BEING WHIPPED. HE WUZ LIKE "ITS GOOD TO BE THA KING" AND WUZ HAPPY.

THEN MOSES CAME IN AND WAS LIKE "DUDE LET MY PPL GO i love you " AND PHAROH WAS LIKE "LOL STFU NOOB." MOSES WUZ LIKE "DUDE IF U DON'T LISTEN I'LL TELL TEH ADMIN!" PHAROH WUZ LIEK "DUDE THERE IS NO ADMIN LOL!"

MOSES WUZ LIKE SAD AND STUFF, BUT GOD CAME DOWN AND SAID "DUDE I AM TEH ADMIN, AND I WANT U TO FREE TEH SLAVES! I'LL GIVE YOU LEET POWAHS!" MOSES WAS LIKE, "K THX" AND BECAME A LEVEL 20 SORCERER.

SO MOSES CAME BACK, AND SAID "i love you. LET THEM GO." PHAROH WAS LIKE "DUDE I TOLD U TO GO AWAY. YOUR ADMIN DOESN'T EXIST." MOSES WUZ LIKE "DUDE UR WRONG, AND I'LL PROVE IT."

THE NEXT DAY, TEH RIVER TURNED ALL BLOODY. PHAROH WUZ LIKE "DUDE WE DIDN'T KILL ANYTHING. MOSES UR A HACKER!" MOSES WUZ LIKE "NO THAT WAS TEH ADMIN!" BUT PHAROH DID NOT LISTEN.

MOSES WUZ LIKE "DUDE HE DOESN'T CARE" TO GOD AND GOD WUZ LIKE "DUDE I'LL DO MORE." SO FROGS FELL FROM TEH SKY. PHAROH WUZ LIEK "DUDE UR FUXXORED UP." BUT DIDN'T CARE.

MOSES STARTED CRYING. "DUDE UR A LAMEASS ADMIN!" BUT GOD SAID "DUDE I AM TRYING." SO THEN A BUNCH OF LICE CAME INTO EGYPT, AND PHAROH GOT PISSED. "DUDE U SUK" HE SAID, BUT HE DID NOT LISTEN STILL.

THEN GOD WUZ ALL LIEK "DUDE STFU" AND SENT HORRIBLE BEASTS TO EAT PHAROH'S FARMS. PHAROH WUZ LIEK "DUDE NOW I HAVE TO REBUILD! UR A HACKER!" BUT STILL HE DID NOT LISTEN.

GOD WUZ LIEK, "DUDE HE'S WEAKENING! USE YOUR LEET SKILLZ, MOSES!" SO MOSES CAST SPELLS, AND ALL TEH LIVESTOCK DIED. PHAROH WUZ LIEK "OMG DUDE I JUST REBUILT!" BUT HE STILL DID NOT LISTEN.

MOSES SAID "DUDE WE NEED TO HURT PHAROH!" SO GOD WUZ LIKE "LOL" AND ALL THE EGYPTIANS GOT SORES AND BOILS AND $HIT. PHAROH SCRATCHED HIMSELF, AND WUZ LIEK "DUDE U CAN'T DO THAT." BUT HE DIDN'T LISTEN STILL.

MOSES WAS THEN LIKE "STFU" AND CAST BLIZZARD ON EGYPT. IT TOOK OUT HIS BARRACKS AND HIS FARMS. PHAROH WENT "DUDE U HAVE LEET SKILLS," BUT HE STILL DID NOT LET HIS SLAVES GO.

GOD WUZ GETTING PISSED OFF AND WUZ LIKE "DUDE U SUK???WHY DON'T U LET MY PPL GO?" AND PHAROH WUZ LIEK "DUDE U RN'T TEH ADMIN!!!" SO GOD WUZ LIKE "STFU I AM" AND CREATED A CARRION SWARM. IT ATE ALL THAT WUZ LEFT.

MOSES WUZ LIKE "DUDE THIS ISN"T WORKING!" SO GOD WUZ LIKE "OKAY. CAST UR BEST SPELL!" AND SO MOSES CAST DARKNESS AS A LVL 20 SORCERER, AND PHAROH COULDN'T SEE. HE WUZ PISSED. "DUDE UR GONNA HEAR FROM MY LAWYER" HE SAID.

GOD FINALLY GOT PO'D. HE SAID "DUDE MOSES, I'M GONNA HAXXOR." AND SO HE DID, AND KILLED OFF ALL OF TEH FIRST HEROS FOR ALL THE EGYPTIANS. PHAROH WAS LIEK "DUDE THIS SUXXORS! GO!"

AND SO THE ISRAELITES LEFT. BUT THEN PHAROH WUZ LIKE "DUDE I NEED PEASANTS," AND WENT AFTER THEM. THE ISRAELITES GOT TO A RIVER AND WUZ LIKE "DUDE WERE DOOMED." BUT MOSES WUZ ALL LIKE "STFU! GOD IS TEH ADMIN!" AND SO GOD HACKED TEH MAP AND CREATED A NEW PATH.

TEH ISRAELITES WENT THROUGH THE PATH, AND WERE ALL LIKE "DUDE GOD ROXXORS!" THEN PHAROH WUZ LIKE 'DUDE" AND HE WENT THROUGH TEH PATH WITH ALL HIS TROOPS. GOD UNHACKED TEH MAP, AND ALL TEH PEOPLE IN TEH NEW PATH GOT BANNED. AND THAT IS HOW MOSES GOT HIS PPL TO BE FREE.

<temporary christian mode>Amazingly accurate. I wonder how many people would actually pay attention to it when presented that way. Hrmmm... </temporary christian mode>

 

[jonmullen]

lmao that stuff is great.

 

[UglyCasanova]

 

[QueBert]

they can use all the l33t speak they want, but in the end they suck. Me, on the other hand. My car keyless entry's code is 31337, and that is straight factory settings. who can mess with that huh?